A Patch of Sunshine

This is a great website for gifts!

2012-02-02T16:04:00.002-08:00

What a cute party favor this would make! And it's something the kids could actually use.

Now, what child wouldn't want to take a bath with this soap?

Wouldn't this be a cute favor at a baby shower? All hand made soap!

Cupcakes made out of soap...cool party favor, don't you think!?

A friend of mine makes handmade soaps and soap petals. They are stunning. If you have the need for a gift, it's a great place to check out!

Above is one of her soap angels...what a great gift for a child for their first communion!

Here is the link to her site....check her out!

http://www.gourmetscents.info/

Shopping Day!

2011-11-09T10:47:00.000-08:00

I went shopping today at Safeway. This is my big "before Thanksgiving" trip, between now and Thanksgiving, I'll only get a few things, like milk and some fresh produce. I bought the turkey last week, a 15lb butterball for $9.99. It's snug in the freezer, waiting to be thawed and brined.

Today was a great shopping day. The total was $134.35 before coupons and card savings and $68.41 after, for a savings of 49%! There was so much good stuff on sale this week, from OJ to broccoli, to apples, to grapefruit. Baby carrots, which are much eaten in our house, are $1 a bag, so I got 3!

I loaded up on all the Thanksgiving food, too...stuffing mix, big bag of potatoes, olives, eggs, bacon, monkey bread (for the day after breakfast) green beans. Now, I'll only get a few fresh items, like milk and fruit and veggies between now and Thanksgiving.

Bread!

2011-11-08T10:06:00.000-08:00

Today I'm baking bread. I love to bake bread and I don't do it often enough. I think that I shy away from baking in the summertime because it's warm and I don't want the oven on when it's warm. With fall here and the cooler weather that comes with it, I decided to bake bread today.

I wish I could say it's more economical but I don't know about that. My family tends to eat a whole loaf a day, when it's home made bread! But then, I can't seem to resist it, either.

It's really very simple, not at all complex, to bake bread. You just start the yeast with some sugar, let it activate and then mix it with a bit of oil and salt and a lot of flour. Then let it rest for an hour or so....then you have a great excuse to read or relax or surf the net for an hour!

Then punch it down and knead and bake.

I know my kids will be happily surprised when they get home from school to fresh baked bread. They've been asking when I'd bake bread again for a while and today is the day!

Don't you just love the internet?

2011-10-26T11:30:00.000-07:00

I sure do! I like that I can get anything I want and I don't have to hunt around to find it.

Tomorrow is Rico's birthday. We are having a small family party on Sunday, but we always do something on a birthday to celebrate, too. So, I'm going to surprise Rico with Angry Bird cupcakes.

We don't own an iphone or an iPad, so Rico only gets to play Angry Birds when friends who have those devices come and visit. Maybe that's why it's such a special game, he can only play it now and then. Anyway, I saw another FB friend make angry bird cupcakes and knew that Rico would love them. So off to Amazon I went and viola! The toppers are plastic, they'll be toys he can play with after the cupcakes are gone.

I'm not a baker, but I think they turned out cute and that he'll like them.

They cost only a couple of dollars to make and that left me the extra money to buy the birds. Besides, with all the money I save on groceries, I can splurge for my kids now and then!

Trout!

2011-10-20T11:24:00.000-07:00

I buy the trout at COSTCO, it's gutted but with the head and tail on. I just cut the tail and head off, then freeze them each one in a single freezer bag. One trout is enough to feed a family of 4. And I mean good portions, not wimpy portions.

To cook the trout, I just heat some canola oil in a pan and then put the trout in and cover. Heat at medium heat for about 7-9 minutes, depending on the size of the fish then uncover and flip the whole thing over. Let cook covered for another 7 minutes or so.

Remove the fish from the pan onto a plate, then use 2 forks to pull the cooked fillet off the fish. It's actually pretty simple, the fish will just flake away from the middle bone. Just insert the fork into the middle of the fish and pull out.

I served the trout with peas and smashed potatoes. It's an esay dinner and not expensive at all. The trout was $15.00 for 4, so each trout is around $4, the peas , 1 can 89 cents on sale and the potatoes are $5.99 for a 10 lb bag and I used 2 potatoes, so about 50 cents.

Total for the dinner around $8.00, not bad.

I made a run to COSTCO today and bought my favorite, hearts of romaine. We'll be having salad with romaine for the next week. At $2.99 a bag, it's such a great deal, since there are 5 romaine hearts in a bag.

The other find I bought was cranberries. A 3 pound bag for $4.99. I took about a pound out and I'll make home made cranberry sauce to serve as a side this week, then freeze the rest. Cranberries freeze very well and you can pull out what you need and put the rest back in the freezer. I love cranberry muffins and cranberry bread, so that'll be coming up, as the weather gets cooler.

Fritata!

2011-10-18T17:41:00.001-07:00

With just the egg and oil in the pan:
Once I've added all the toppings, except the grated cheese:

A fritatta is a money saving cook's best friend. If you don't know what it is, now is the time to learn. It's an egg dish and it's very versitile.

My kids call it "egg pizza". I think of it as a quiche without a crust. At any rate, it's a super easy way to get rid of leftovers, while creating a delicious meal.

You start with a cast iron pan. Pour enough oil to cover the bottom, so it won't stick. Doesn't matter what kind of oil. Then whip up some eggs. I usually figure 3 eggs per person, more or less, so for a family of 4, you'd use about 10-12, depending on how hearty your eaters are. Pour the egg mixture into the warm pan.

Then, add whatever toppings you like. Really, whatever bits of leftovers you have. In this example, I used a bit of leftover pork tenderloin (I had one piece left over, not enough for anything else), some red bell pepper, some green oinions, and one tomato. But I could have used just about anything...bacon, mushrooms, cilantro, whatever you have on hand works.

Then leave it on the stove for about 5 minutes, just enough for the bottom to set. Top with some grated cheese and bake in a 350 oven for 35-40 minutes. Serve.

Easy, tasty and inexpensive! I'll add some bread and apple slices on the side and that's our dinner tonight!

It's Tuesday, Menu Planning Day!

2011-10-18T13:05:00.000-07:00

I plan my menu around what's on sale any given week. I shop at Safeway, so that's where I look for bargains.

I'll shop on Friday, so I can take advantage of their Friday only specials.

Some of the good bargains at Safeway this week:

Chicken leg quarters for 69 cents a pound. You have to buy the value pack, but it's worth it. Break them up yourself (cut the drumstick from the thigh) and you save 30 cents a pound! Then freeze some in family size portions for future meals.

Red seedless grapes are 99 cents a pound and you can buy a 6 lb. bag of oranges for $5, so that will be our fruit this week.

Another Friday special is the $5 lb raw shrimp, I'll get some shrimp. A pound of shrimp can feed the whole family. If you're not sure how to cook the shrimp, here's a great recipe from 10 Dollar Dinners:
http://www.foodnetwork.com/recipes/melissa-darabian/lemony-shrimp-scampi-pasta-recipe2/index.html

Safeway also has cereal on sale...Honey Nut Cheerios. Since this is Marielle's favorite, I'll buy 2 at the sale price, then slap on a coupon for save $1. on 2 and pay $1.47 for each box. By the way, this coupon is from more than a month ago. I only clip coupons on items I buy anyway, then I just sock them away and once a week, I look through and see if I have any match ups. It takes only minutes this way.

If you like smoked salmon and I do (this is a guity pleasure for me), it's on sale 2 packages for $4. So I'll buy a package of that, as well, and enjoy some lox and bagels for breakfast a couple of days next week.

I'll probably stop in on Monday and get some of the meatballs. They have a Monday only special of a bag of meatballs for $5. That's a get this deal, go through the quick check and get out of the store, type of buy for me. I like to pair the meatballs with cranberry sauce and chili sause in the crock pot for an easy meal. At $5 a 2 pound bag, that'll make a couple of meals and really inexpensive, too.

Brunch!

2011-10-16T11:03:00.001-07:00

On Sundays, in our house, I only cook 2 meals....brunch and dinner. It's a chance for me not to spend all day in the kitchen and the kids love brunch.

I usually make brunch around 11 am. If the kids are up early and hungry, I'll tell them to just munch on a piece of fruit until brunch.

Usually I'll make something like french toast or pancakes, sometimes a Dutch Baby and then eggs and bacon. If you have leftover sandwich bread that's kind of stale from the week, a great way to use it, is to make french toast. After dipping in a milk and egg wash and cooking, you just can't tell it's old bread.

So today I made, eggs, pancakes and bacon. The kids loved it. It wasn't difficult....I microwave the bacon, while making the pancakes and eggs. The pancakes I made from a mix (just add water).

So, total for brunch:

Pancakes $1.50
Eggs ($1.39 a dozen on sale, I used 6) 70 cents
Bacon ($2.99 a pound, I used half) $1.50

So, a great Sunday morning brunch, cost: $3.70

Feed Your Whole Family with One Chicken Breast

2011-10-15T10:17:00.000-07:00

Ingredients:

2 tbs olive oil
1/4 chopped onion
1 boneless/skinless chicken breast
3 tbs flour
1/2 cup chicken stock
1 lb (or more, if you like) broccoli
1/4 red bell pepper, diced
3 tbs teriyaki glaze

Rice or noodles

Optional: parmasean cheese or parsely

One thing the Chinese have known forever, is that if you go low on protein and high on veggies, you can feed a lot of people for a little money.

So, with that in mind, last night I made a dish for the whole family, using one boneless, skinless chicken breast. I buy these in bulk at COSTCO and freeze them, then pull them out to use.

This is what I did:

In a skillet, heat 2 tbs olive oil. Add 1/4 diced onion. Let the onion wilt for a couple of minutes then turn up the heat.

While the onion is wilting, cut the chicken breast into cubes. Don't worry if they aren't all exact cubes.

Dredge the chicken in flour. (This is important as the flour will thicken the sauce.) Don't salt or pepper the chicken, the teriyaki and chicken broth will add enough salt.

Add the chicken to the now hot pan. Sear it on all sides.

Remove chicken to a plate.

Add 1/2 cup of chicken broth and deglaze the pan, scraping up all the bits that are on the bottom (they are full of flavor)

Add 1/4 red bell pepper diced and 1 lb of broccoli cut into pieces. Throw the chicken back in, bring to a boil and let simmer for about 5 minutes. This will cook the chicken through and cook the veggies and reduce the sauce, all at the same time.

Turn off the heat and add 2-3 tablespoons of teriyaki glaze.

Serve over rice or pasta. Garnish with a bit of cheese and/or parsley.

This was a huge hit in my family. Everyone had a generous portion and then seconds, too!

Brocolli is on sale right now at Safeway for 79 cents a pound. Red bells were on sale last week for $1 each. Chicken breast, 8 in a pack, at COSTCO for 15.00 Noodles, 1 entire package, 89 cents (from the pantry, were on sale a few weeks back at Safeway)

Total for dinner:

Brocolli 79 cents

Bell pepper 25 cents

Noodles 89 cents

Chicken $2.00

So, dinner for the family: Under $5.00

Full of flavor, tasty and healthy!

Side note: This recipe would work easily as well over rice. My kids are just on a pasta kick right now, so I used pasta. The cost would still be very low, as rice is about 30 cents a serving.

Another "no cooking night"

2011-10-14T19:59:00.000-07:00

So Wednesday, we had PTA meeting and that means get homework done, a little down time and then off to PTA. Since Marielle was behind in her reading, we had to sit together for about an hour to catch up and that put my schedule behind.

I had a coupon for $1.50 off new Buitoni frozen ravioli and it was on sale from $9.99 to $8.99 at Safeway last week, so I bought a couple of packages. I had tried the chicken and mushroom at Bunco and loved it. So I bought one of those and one of the lobster and shrimp ravioli dinner as well.

The package says dinner for two on it, but really ,this is easily dinner for 4. Just pair it with some garlic bread and a salad and you are good. Really, the amount is very generous, I cannot imagine 2 people eating all of it, well, maybe 2 teenage boys but for most families this is really easily made into dinner for 4.

I didn't have high expectations, really, because most products that say "shrimp and lobster" usually have this mush that you can't tell what it is inside the ravioli. But this had actual shrimp and pieces of lobster that you could tell was lobster. It was easy to make, just boil the pouch and ravioli and while that was cooking, I made a salad and some garlic bread.

It made a great easy, quick meal. The price was right (with the coupon, the cost of the ravioli was $7.49) a bargain for this quality product.

I'll definitely serve it again.

Fish and Weekly Safeway Deals

2011-10-12T10:07:00.000-07:00

Fish is a very healthy food. I often hear, "But my kids don't eat fish. Well, maybe fish sticks."
If your kids don't eat fish, it's time to introduce them to it. They say you have to serve something 10 times or more, before many kids will accept it. So start serving more fish!

Fish isn't really expensive, either. We buy our fish at COSTCO, in the big size, then we break it into meal size portions and freeze the meal size portions in the freezer and pull them out when we are ready to prepare. Take it out the night before and leave it in the fridge and it will defrost by dinner time.

Another great thing about fish is that it's super fast to prepare. Last night we had talapia. I buy it in fillets. I just sauteed it in the pan with a bit of butter and some spices. I used paprika, seasoning salt and tumeric, but if your family isn't into spices, just use seasoning salt. It takes only about 3 minutes per side.

I made sauteed mushrooms to go with the fish...just sautee in a bit of butter and then just before they are done, I added 2 tablespoons of Greek salad dressing for a great flavor.

With that, I served baby carrots and Noodle Roni. Yes, you can make your dinner easier but adding one "semi-home-made" item.

Total cost for dinner: Fish $2.00, carrots 20 cents, mushrooms $2.00, NoodleRoni $.89
So dinner for us cost a little over $5.00

One way to cut down on costs for food is to make your protien serving smaller. We each had half a fillet. That came to about 5 ounces. Most Americans think you need huge portions of protien, but you don't. It's far healthier and much cheaper to eat more veggies and less protien. I assure you that none of us left the table hungry.

______________________

Deals this week at Safeway:

Broccoli is a great deal at 79 cents a pound...buy enough for a couple nights dinners and don't be stingy, you can put lots of broccoli on the plate for pennies.

Apples, I think it's Gala apples, but not 100%, are on sale for 99 cents a pound...my kids will have apples in their lunch this week.

Bananas are 79 cents a pound, a good price. We'll have bananas as snacks this week.

Eggs are on sale for $2.49 for 18 eggs. Why not make breakfast for dinner one night this week? Eggs are one of the cheapest protiens you can get. Another idea with the eggs is a fritatta, one of my favorite ways to cook eggs.

Onions are on sale for 99 cents a pound. Carmelized onions are delicious and make a great side dish.

Last week, Safeway had a special that if you buy $75. in groceries, you got a $10 off coupon for future groceries. I took advantage of that and used my $10. off coupon this week.

Total cost for groceries for us this week: $47.82

One thing I try to do, is buy big one week and small the next. So this week I bought some staples like milk and eggs, but tried to keep my overall shopping small. We'll use things from the freezer and pantry, adding fresh items for the week.

Soup

2011-10-11T19:09:00.000-07:00

Soups make a delicious meal and they are budget friendly.

I make taco soup with stuff in the pantry. I buy the canned goods when they are on deep sale, like 89 cents a can.

I make my taco soup a bit differently than most recipes I've seen. I don't like the texture of ground beef in soup. So I substitute sausage. And that's a great thing to do...substitute! Don't be afraid to mess with recipes, leaving out things, changing things around, so that the recipe works for you and your family.

So, here's my recipe for taco soup:

2 sausages (I like chicken sausage), diced
1 can corn
1 can pinto beans
1 can pinquitos
1 can diced tomatoes (I like the kind with garlic and basil)
1/2 onion diced
2 tablespoons olive oil
1 packet dry ranch dressing mix
1 packet dry taco seasoning
About 2 1/2 cups water

In a pot pour in the olive oil, heat and add the onions. Let the onions wilt on low heat for about 5 minutes. In the meantime, dice up the sausages. Add the sausages, then add all the other ingredients. Just dump the cans into the pot, no need to drain or rinse. Bring to a boil, stir and let simmer for 35-45 minutes. That's it.

I garnish mine with some chopped cilantro and some crushed tortilla chips. I'll add a side of bread and a piece of fruit and that's dinner!

Cost:

1/2 package chicken sausage $2.00 (on sale for 4.99 with a $1 coupon)
1 can each: corn, pintos, pinquitos, tomatoes $3.60
Taco mix envelope: 89 cents on sale
Dry ranch dressing $1.10

Total for the soup: under $8.00

This easily feeds our family dinner with left overs, which I gladly eat as lunch one or two times more.

Leftovers

2011-10-07T12:13:00.001-07:00

I know, I know, I hear it all the time, "My family won't eat leftovers". Well, if you are throwing out leftovers, you are throwing away money. It's that simple.

My family isn't keen on leftovers, too. So I re-invent them.

We had left over chicken from the salsa chicken sandwiches I'd made. So, rather than toss it out, I reinvented it as a pasta dish.

This is what I used:

I made half a box of pasta, per the instructions. Then, I added one tablespoon butter and one tablespoon sour cream to the pasta, after draining. I cut up the leftover chicken, then some red and yellow bell pepper. I threw in half a can of corn and half a can of olives. Then I added about a quarter cup of italian salad dressing (adjust for taste). I threw that in with the pasta and then topped with some fresh cilantro and viola, here's the dinner:

Now, does this look like leftovers to you?! Everyone loved it and ate it up!

My Shopping Trip Today

2011-10-07T12:04:00.001-07:00

So today I went shopping. I try to shop only once a week. My last shopping trip was on October 1st and the total then was $54.00. I try to keep our total food budget under $400. per month, but usually it comes out to about $450.

So this trip, the some great things on sale were:

Bagged baby carrots (love these, so easy, great snack) $1 a bag
Pears (got the red kind, all kinds on sale) 99 cents a pound
Progresso light soup: 2 for $3.00 (added a $1 off 4 cans coupon)
Bertolli Meal soup, this is a new product, priced at $7.99, got it for $2.49 with card savings and coupon
Pastrami: $2.49 for half a pound
Bell peppers $1 each
Shrimp ring: $8.99 (I'll use this when the family comes over for Rico's birthday)
Yakisoba noodles: $1 each (These are great when you need a fast side dish to serve.)

So total was $ 190.33, after coupon and club savings, new total $120.84 Savings of $69.49
Plus I got a coupon for $10. off my next shopping trip!

I don't feel like cooking....

2011-10-02T11:05:00.000-07:00

That's how I felt last night. It was a busy day and I just didn't feel like cooking. But, I won't fast food it. Too expensive...if I'm going to serve less than healthy, good food, well, I'll make it at home and pay pennies instead of $20 for a quick meal for us.

So, the kids chose Chef Boyardee mini raviolis and I had a Progresso hearty soup for dinner. We paired it with half a loaf of french bread and some fruit.

Mini raviolis, 1 can (the kids split it) 89 cents (on sale)
Bread, 1/2 a loaf 99 cents
Soup, Progresso (0n sale) $1.29
Fruit $2.00

Total cost for dinner for 3 of us, a little over $5.00

Side note on couponing: One way to get coupons for items you use all the time, is to "like" them on Facebook. Many manufacturer's will offer coupons to FB followers, that you can just print off your computer and save money on items you buy anyway.

Another thing you can do, is write the manufacturer, telling them that you like their product and requesting coupons. It takes only a little time, but you'll save money.

If you don't get a Sunday paper, you can also request that the coupons be mailed to you, if you go to the website of the company that makes the coupons. Many will allow you to print them directly from the computer, as well.

Pork tenderloin with rosemary

2011-10-01T12:36:00.001-07:00

This is how I most like to cook pork tenderloin. I start with a bed of thinly sliced onions. I use 1 whole onion. Then I wash and pat dry the tenderloin. I put a bit of olive oil on it and then put a rub of a mix of 1 tsp seasoning salt, 1 tsp paprika and 1 tbsp brown sugar. I chop up some rosemary and then roll it in the rosemary and set it on top of the onions.

I add 1/4 cup white wine and 1/2 cup chickn broth to the onions. Then I put the pan into the oven at 400 degrees and cook for 45-50 minutes.

It doesn't take long to prepare the tenderloin and it comes out moist and flavorful.

To go with it, I made potatoes. I just diced up the potatoes, then threw them into a ziplock bag with olive oil and a packet of dry italian dressing. (Sometimes I'll use dry ranch dressing, too, just depends on what mood I'm in, both turn out great.) Then I shake the bag to coat the potatoes and put them on a cookie sheet and pop them in the oven with the tenderloin. I'll turn the potatoes over once about half way through cooking.

I served them with baby carrots...easy and my kids like them (so do I). I like to dip mine in hummus, the kids will dip in ranch dressing. Baby carrots were on sale for 99 cents a bag a week ago at Safeway, so I picked up 3 bags.

I didn't realize until this morning that I took the picture of Rico's plate, which didn't have the onions on them. Darn. The onions are great...they carmelize with the juices from the pork and have great flavor. But Rico doesn't like onions, so I don't give him any, Marielle and I get to eat them all!

The pork tenderloin I got from Safeway on a $5 Friday special. We use half the tenderloin at a time, which gives 8 slices, 2 per person for our family. So the pork was $2.50. I used 4 potatoes, so about a pound, which would be about $1 for the whole dinner. Carrots were pennies. So the whole dinner cost about $5.50, factoring in the dip and the dressing packet and that's for 4 people. With only 3 of us eating, there are leftovers, which I'll use in the next couple of days.

Does this look like a "cheap" dinner to you? You can feed good meals and not spend a fortune at the supermarket!

Side note: I keep rosemary in the house almost always. It stays good for a long time (3-4 weeks) and is very flavorful. Some fresh herbs are expensive and I'll use dried, especially ones that don't keep long. But rosemary is almost always in the house fresh.

Ingredients:

1/2 pork tenderloin

1 tsp seasoning salt

1 tsp paprika

1 tbsp brown sugar

couple of sprigs of fresh rosemary chopped

4 potatoes diced

1 packet italiain dry dressing mix

baby carrots (dips optional)

Couponing, Menu Planning

2011-10-01T12:01:00.000-07:00

So the latest, greatest thing in saving money on groceries are coupons. Now don't get me wrong, I like coupons, but I'm not about extreme couponing at all.

Here's what I do with coupons....We get 2 Sunday papers. I go through the coupons and clip only those coupons for items I already use. The one exception is a new product, that I might like to try.

I think that too many people get sucked in by coupons and buy things they don't want, don't need or won't use.

I put the coupons in a folder, I don't sort them at all.

When the sale ad comes out on Tuesday for the upcoming week, I go over the sale ads and see what's on sale that we use. I make a list and start planning a menu. After that, I check my list against any coupons I might have. That way, I don't use coupons that are for things I don't really need.

One thing that is very important, though....get a "loyalty card" from the store or stores where you normally buy your groceries. In my case, I most often shop Safeway, so I have a Safeway Club Card. Next, go online and sign up with the online club, linked to your loyalty card. In Safeway's case, it's called "Just for U".

Every week they send me an email reminder and every week, I also check out these specials. They add unadvertised specials and also "just for you" specials....special prices that I get, based on prior purchases, for certain items. Load these onto your loyaty card. Load everything that you might possibly use, even if you don't think you will use it. It takes about 2 minutes and that way, if you do decide to pick up something off your list, maybe you'll get a better price anyway.

The loyalty card is a good way to save on produce, which doesn't often go on sale. For example, this week, gala apples are $1.79 a pound. But, using the online coupon from my club card, my price is 79 cents a pound. This is not advertised in the paper, this is not advertised in the store, it's something I can only get, using the club card, as an online deal.

Also, using the club card online, you don't have to play with paper coupons from the ads, so that makes it easier, too.

Whats on sale often determines how I plan my menu. For example, this week oranges are 99 cents a pound and so are green grapes. As mentioned above, I'm also getting gala apples for 79 cents a pound, so that's the fruit I bought. I'll use it for lunches and also with meals.

Meat, fish, chicken will come out of the freezer this week, since there are no great special prices in those departments. I also didn't find any great deals on sides, but Safeway does have a "buy 8, mix and match and save 50 cents" an item, so I did stock up on kraft mac and cheese, a favorite in my house. With the 50 cents off, it came to 69 cents a package, which is a good deal.

One other thing, with coupons. Normally you want to buy the biggest bag, biggest size, because it gives you the lowest per item price. For example, a 5 lb bag of potatoes are $3.99 at Safeway right now, but a 10lb bag is only $1 more or $4.99. So it makes sense to buy the bigger bag and get twice the amount for $1 more.

But, it if you have a good coupon, like a dollar off coupon, it often does better to put it on the smallest size available, because then you are saving more on the per item price. A dollar off the family size of triscuits, for example, might bring the price down from $4.99 to $3.99. But a dollar off the regular size might bring the price down from $2,99 to $1.99, making it a better bargain.

An Easy Recipe

2011-09-30T08:05:00.001-07:00

Last night for dinner, I made pulled chicken sandwiches with french fries. The chicken is very easy, though it does take some time. I buy boneless, skinless chicken breasts in bulk and then freeze them in single meal sizes (which for us is 2 in a freezer bag). I let it defrost overnight in the fridge. This recipe takes about 45 minutes to make, but the prep work is minimal.

In a frying pan, heat some olive oil, then add the chicken breasts. Sear until brown on both sides. Add chicken broth until it's half way up the side of the chicken. Bring to a boil and let simmer, in a covered pan for 20 minutes.

In the meantime, I just warmed up the oven and took a bag of french fries out of the freezer. The fries were on sale a couple of weeks ago at Safeway. Make the fries according to direction.

After 20 minutes, turn the breasts over. Uncover for the last 5 minutes to let the broth reduce a bit. Then I removed the chicken and used 2 forks to pull the meat apart. Lastly, I returned the chicken to the pan and dumped half a jar of salsa on it. That's it. Then I spooned chicken onto hamburger buns (which I got a few weeks ago on sale for 99 cents a bag and froze).

The finished result: It got thumbs up all around the table!

I served it with a salad of hearts of romain (COSTCO, 6 for $2.99), a bit of chopped cilantro and diced yellow and red peppers (on sale last week at Safeway for $1 each).

What's needed to make this dinner:

Boneless skinless chicken breast

Chicken broth

Half a can of salsa

Hamburger buns

French fries

For the salad:

Hearts of Romain lettuce

Bit of chopped cilantro

Red and yellow bell peppers

I would imagine you could make this same sandwich using a slow cooker. Just sear the chicken, throw it in the crock pot with the chicken broth, cook low for 6-8 hours or high for 4 hours, then pull apart and dump the salsa on it. I haven't tried it, but I bet it would work.

Side note: The hearts of romain at COSTCO is a great deal...you'll get 6 hearts of romain for $2.99. Most stores will sell 2-3 at the same price. I don't make special trips to COSTCO for the romain, but if I'm there, I always pick up a package. Six romain may sound like a lot, but it does stay good for over a week, so in our family we can use it up before it spoils.

So, a very tasty dinner and not a lot of money. This is one I'll make again...everyone loved it!

KNOW YOUR PRICES!!

2011-09-29T12:08:00.000-07:00

I can't stress this enough. The bottom line, in providing good, wholesome meals for your family is to know when the price on an item is a good price and when it's a great price and you should stock up.

A carton of eggs, is a carton of eggs, you can easily tell if a dozen eggs is on sale at a good price. (I find them for 99 cents on sale.) But what about cheese? What about a jar of peanut butter? What is a great price on those items?

My first piece of advice is take a calculator with you shopping. You can find them on sale for a dollar at Target when they have the school supplies on sale. It's the best dollar investment you'll make. You need to know the per item price...per ounce, per pound, per serving. And for that you need a calculator.

See, most manufacturers know that most folks are grabbed by the overall price of the item....hey, rice on sale for $1.99 a package, what a great deal! But it may not be a great deal. What is the total weight of the package and what is the per ounce price? You may find that you are paying more to buy that "sale item" than if you bought another brand at regular price. But you can't know unless you can compare per ounce prices, and for that you need a calculator.

One of the tricks that many manufacturers have been using since the recession started, is to make packages smaller, but leave the price the same, thus driving up the per ounce price. Most people won't notice that the "new and improved" packaging also comes with 4 ounces less orange juice than it did before.

Have you noticed this? Sugar used to be sold in 5 lb packages, but now, almost all the packages are 4lb packages. So, even if the price remained the same for a package of sugar, you are paying more, per ounce.

Really, really pay attention to the staple items your family uses on a regular basis. We all don't eat the same things, so the price of a bottle of hot sauce may not be important to me, but if you use it on almost all your food, it's important to you. Really get to know the prices on the foods that your family uses most.

Look at the per pound price for meat, chicken and fish. Try using a cheaper cut of meat and cooking it differently to save money. I'll be posting some recipes in the future that can be used to make "cheap meat" taste great.

Lastly, be open to what are called "Manager Specials". These are items in the store that are on sale but not advertised. They can be produce, milk, meat and chicken, frozen foods or bakery items. There is usually one place in the store that has each of these items on "Manager's Special". Get to know your store and find this place.

These are often:

Meat: Meat that has an expiration date that is one or 2 days away. It's still perfectly fine. It's often anywhere from 30% to 50% off. Buy it. Freeze it. You can use it to make a meal and save money.

Dairy: This might be overstock or again, things with quick expiration dates. Know your family and if you can use it before the date. Milk will stay good, if kept refridgerated, for at least 7 days from the "sell by" date. If you have kids like mine, you won't have to worry about the milk going bad, it'll be gone in a couple of days.

Freezer: These are often products that the store may no longer be selling or that will soon change packaging. So, if a manufacturer is going to roll out a new look, they'll put the remaining stock of the old look on sale, often up to 50% off. I don't often use frozen meals, but it is a good way to have a couple of super quick, no cook meals around.

There is usually one area (sometimes 2) that have seasonal items that are on sale because they are past the season (like Easter items or Christmas items) as well as other canned or boxed items on sale. Check this area out, every time you shop. You never know what you might find and if it's a good price, buy it.

An example of this: Last week, I found about 40 different spices on sale 50% off. This was an unadvertised manager special. I use spices in my cooking and bought 4 spices at a great price! It also gave me the chance to try a spice I've been wanting to mix into my cooking but just couldn't bring myself to buy...garam masala. But at 50% off, it was worth it to buy it and try it in a couple of new recipes.

One note on the manager specials......Is this really something you will use? Really? If so, buy it. If not, well, you are just spending money you don't need to spend. Use that as your guide.

Cooking and Recipes

2011-09-29T11:17:00.000-07:00

I think it's really important, if you want to save money, to have some fast, easy, weeknight dinner recipes. Some good places I've found these, are with those Food Network folks, Rachel Ray and Melissa D'Arabian. They both often have quick, easy meals. Melissa's show is 10 Dollar Dinners and well worth DVRing and watching.

With that in mind, I thought I'd share a few of my "go to" meals, for a fast, easy, hectic weeknight dinner. Disclaimer: I cook by sight and don't really measure, so my measurements are not exact. Play around with the recipe, if you like it, add more, take out some...

Polenta with Chili and Cheese

This one is super simple and tastes good.

Make polenta according to directions on label. (Now I do change this up a bit. If it says to make it with water, I'll delete the salt and throw a couple of bullion cubes in the water while boiling, before adding the polenta. Then I use 1/2 cup less water and add 1/2 cup of milk instead, to make the polenta creamier). A lot of folks think polenta is hard to make. It isn't. It's just ground corn meal and it only takes minutes.

When the polenta is cooked, pour it into a casserole pan.

Open a can of chili. Any type, whatever you like and spoon that on top of the polenta.

Get some grated cheese and sprinkle liberally on top. Sometimes I'll grate the cheese, sometimes I'll buy it pre-grated...doesn't matter. I'd say I use about half a cup, but I never measure.

Pop it into a 350 degree oven for 25 minutes. Serve.

I add a side of veggies (like the canned peas) or a fresh salad and that's dinner.

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Pasta with Whatever and bacon or sausage (like that name?)

Pasta is cheap...you can get it on sale for 88 cents a package and it's easy to make, just throw it in boiling water. But what to do with it, after it's cooked????

Be creative and use what you have in the house. One of my favorite ways to serve it is with bacon or sausage and tomatoes, olives and onions.

Here's what I do:

In a pan, pour about a tablespoon of olive oil and heat up....add half a chopped onion and let it sweat for a minute or 2. Add sausage at this point, if you are using it and cook through. If I use bacon, I'll pre-cook the bacon in the microwave for 3-4 minutes then dice it up and throw it in to finish in the pan. Then I chop up a couple of fresh tomatoes (we grow these so often have them in the house), I chop up cilantro or parseley (whatever you have that's a fresh herb) and open a can of sliced olives. All of these I throw in. Then I add some salad dressing. I'll add what I'm in the mood for....italian dressing tastes good, but so does greek or honey mustard. I'll add about 1/4 cup of the dressing and turn off the heat. Pour all of that over the pasta and serve. That's it. That's dinner. It's fast, inexpensive and tastes good.

You can serve it with fresh fruit, if you like, or some bread on the side but you don't have to.
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Both of these recipes are so much cheaper than stopping for fast food and I have the ingredients in the house. It's ok to be creative, too. Don't have tomatoes? No problem...add half a can of diced tomatoes. Don't like olives? No problem, leave them out or use some capers to add flavor.

Build up your pantry, so you have items you can use for quick, easy meals. Watch for the bacon to go on sale, buy it and freeze it, it does fine. Watch for canned, diced tomatoes to go on sale ( you can get them for less than a dollar a can), same with olives.

Side note: You can easily cook with frozen bacon. Just open the package and cut 1/4 inch all the way across the end of the bacon...there you go, bacon bits. Throw those right into the pan and cook them up. They add great flavor. Put the rest of the frozen bacon in a freezer bag, pop back into the freezer and use the next time you need to add quick flavor to a meal.

You can do a similar type of thing with breakfast type sausage. Just pull out 1 or 2 frozen sausages, cut them frozen and throw them into the pan. Put the rest back into the freezer in a freezer bag for future use.

I find bacon on sale for $2.99 a pound and buy 2. Then I keep it frozen and cut off bits as I need it. NO WASTE!!!!

I use salad dressing to add flavor to meals often. The premade kind, you can find on sale and often add a coupon on top of it, getting a good deal. For example, about a month ago, Ken's Steakhouse brand salad dressing was on sale for $2.00 a bottle and I had a save $1 off 1 coupon...so I paid $1 for each bottle of dressing. I bought Honey Mustard and Greek dressing and both add good flavor to a dish like this. It also keeps it from getting boring...changing the flavor of the dressing changes the flavor of the whole dish.

Blogging Again

2011-09-29T09:59:00.000-07:00

Ok, so it's been a long time since I've blogged, mostly because I couldn't figure out exactly what to write about. I had a hip replacement and a knee replacement and those just aren't fun things to write about.

But, I keep getting asked by friends about money saving shopping tips. Since I've been asked over and over again, I thought I'd write about that and maybe just things that are happening in our lives at the same time.

I didn't just decide out of the blue to start saving money when grocery (and other) shopping. My husband was laid off and out of work for 16 months. In between those 16 months, he did work 2 temp jobs, both up in Alaska, once for 3 months and once for 5 months. He finally landed a full time, permanent gig, but alas, in a state 2500 miles away from us. So, now he's working full time, but until he can find something close to home, we are supporting 2 households on one income. Yes, it's a juggling act. So, I had to batten down the hatches and try and save money where ever I could.

The most obvious was our food bill. Now, let me start by saying that we aren't a junk food junkie type of family. Yeah, sure, like everyone, I'll make a frozen pizza now and then to just get the kids fed, but most of the time, I put wholesome, good tasting food on the table. I try to keep the grocery bill down and this is where I'll post my thoughts on how to do it.

Yes, I do coupon...but only for things I use anyway. I might try something new, if there's a good price and a good coupon, but if you are going to coupon, stay away from processed foods. They are more expensive, no matter how you cut it. Even if you can get that granola bar for a dollar off, it's not nearly as good for you or the kids as eggs for breakfast, which cost a heck of a lot less.

Yes, I'm a stay at home mom and not all the suggestions I have will work, especially if you are a work away from home mom. Here's my thing...it's my JOB, as a stay at home mom, to do all those things that work away from home moms don't have time for. I get it. I used to work full time and I know that some of the things I write about just aren't possible if you are working away from home. But some will work, too.

So, the first few tips...

Number one is know your prices. What is a good price to pay for chicken? What's a great sale price? It's really important to know if a sale price is 2 cents off or 80 cents off per pound. So, start by knowing your prices. It may sound daunting, but it really isn't.

If you get a newspaper, check the sale ads. If you do nothing else, watch the prices over a period of time. That same cheese that's "on sale" this week for $2.49 a package was just on sale last week for $1.89 a package. I would highly recommend subscribing to your local newspaper, if for nothing else, the sale pages from the local stores. You'll make your money back, in the long run.

Now, some people run store to store, but I don't for the most part. I like to do most all my shopping in one place and get it over with. Sometimes I'll run to a different store, if there is something outstanding and if I'm going to be nearby anyway. But most of the time, it's once a week and out.

For staples, like milk, eggs, butter, bread, etc., it's really important to know when a price is good and when it's great. When it's good, buy one, if you need to, to tide you over. When it's great, stock up. Eggs last a long time, so does bread, if you freeze it. Just put the whole loaf in a freezer bag before you put it in the freezer to keep it fresh. When the bread goes on sale for 99 cents a loaf, I buy 3-4 loaves and use one and freeze the others.

When canned veggies go on sale for 88 cents a can, I'm that crazy lady, loading 10 cans of peas and 10 cans of corn and 10 cans of green beans into the cart. Why not? That means I'm paying pennies a serving and serving healthy stuff. Now, here's another tip....when serving canned veggies...add a tablespoon of butter, then microwave, then chop up some fresh herbs and throw them in. So, for example, if you are making a can of peas, add butter, nuke and then chop up some fresh parseley and throw it in. It will freshen up the dish and make the presentation better, too. Takes only a minute, but makes a big difference.

Next.....menu plan and make a list. This is really important. You don't want to go into the store and wander the iles....you'll grab this and that and spend too much. Take out the sale ad and see what's on sale and use the sale things to make menu decisions. It's not as hard as you think.

So, say that a store has grapes and apples on sale this week, at a good price, then that means that my kids will have grapes and apples in their lunches. See, it's simple.

Start with the simple stuff and go from there. Even if you shave $10 off your bill, buying only fruit that is on sale, well, you've saved $10.!

Watch for the super sales....plan your menu around them. So, if pork tenderloin is a $5 Friday special, pick up pork tenderlion, better yet, pick up 4, use one and freeze 3. Pork tenderloin is usually around $10-11 a piece, so you are saving 50% and you want to stock up.

A caution....when you first begin, you might actually not save that much money, as you build your pantry and freezer. But, you'll soon see that using those items from your pantry and freezer and just buying a few, fresh things will save you a ton of money!

TRAIN TOWN!

2010-08-11T09:56:00.000-07:00

Some pictures from Train Town....we went yesterday....

And some from 2006, when we went before....

Four years...what a difference!

We had a lot of fun at Train Town....we met up with my friend, Dorothy, who is my "adopted mom"...we adopted each other as adults....I've known her for 30 years...that's a long time!

After Train Town, we headed over to Mary's Pizza Shack for lunch. I love going to Mary's...wish we had one near us.

More swimming and a Mommy brag

2010-07-29T21:27:00.000-07:00

Today was the end of the second session of swim lessons for the kids. There won't be any more swim lessons this year for us. They went for 4 weeks, 4 times a week.

Rico started at level one and is now in level 3. He showed amazing progress in just those few weeks.

Marielle found out today that she is now level 4!! This is a great leap! It's the hardest level up, because you go from beginning swimmer to intermediate. She says it scares her to be level 4, but it doesn't scare me...I've seen her in the water and she's doing great.

At level 1 and 2 they introduce the crawl and backstroke. At level 3, they learn side breathing on the crawl and the start of the butterfly and breast stroke.

I'm so proud of both my swimmers today!

Swimming

2010-07-24T08:08:00.000-07:00

Marielle is like a fish in the water. She loves it, she can't get enough of it. For the past 2 summers, she's taken swim lessons and now she thinks she can swim like Michael Phelps. Now, don't get me wrong, she's doing quite well but just not as well as she thinks she is doing.

Rico, on the other hand, has never been really fond of the water. We enrolled him in swim lessons 2 years ago....he hung on the side of the pool, wouldn't let go and cried in a very loud voice, "I'm gonna DIE!!!" Ok, so I gave him a bye. But, I told him that when he was 6, he had to take lessons.

I really feel that swimming is a life skill. It's too important a skill not to know how to do. Especially out here in California, where there are pools and beaches.

So, this summer he started lessons. Right off the bat, I could see that he was doing everything they asked him. The first day, after class, when I complimented him on this, he said, "Mom, I have to do what the teacher tells me". Ah, yes, I forgot about this. Rico is a stickler for following teacher's instructions. He saw the swim instructor as another teacher and did what he was told to do. He's surprisingly good. He went from level 1 to level 2 in 2 weeks and is doing really well mastering the timing of the crawl.

If he keeps up this pace, he might just catch his sister in swimming abilities.

It's Raining Teeth!

2010-07-22T08:51:00.000-07:00

The other morning, the kids were at it. You know those mornings...one or the other running to me..."He pushed me", "She has my toy", "He shoved me". Well, I had had it. I was up to here with all that. I gave them both a warning, play together nice or don't play at all. If they couldn't play nice, then they'd each go to their own room to play.

Not 5 minutes later, Marielle comes in and before she can say anything, I jump on her, "I told you that you 2 had to play nice, really, can't you play nice for 5 minutes?". She holds out her hand and says, "Rico lost another tooth! He pulled it out himself!"

Now I felt one inch big and said, "Wow, great!"

He's now lost 8 teeth, 4 of them in the last 6 weeks or so. His top baby teeth are outta there! He does have one of his front top teeth coming in now.

But, I have to say, I outdid myself as tooth fairy. I decided to do something new.....I wrote a note (on the computer) from the tooth fairy. It said that although the tooth is lovely, she had more than enough teeth at the moment and he could keep this one. Then I added the money, some "fairy dust" (glitter) and put the envelope back under Rico's pillow.

He was thrilled and amazed in the morning....imagine getting money, a note and getting to keep your tooth!

Plums

2010-07-22T08:31:00.000-07:00

When we bought our house, six years ago, there was a plum tree at the end of the yard. It gave up some plums and they were good plums, too. Plums that you don't often see in supermarkets around here...they type with purple skin and red meat.

Well, this tree was at least 20 years old and hadn't been trimmed in a long time, so come winter, I had Ralph cut it back. We cut it back pretty severely, but it needed it. The next year, we got some plums, not a huge amount, but it was growing back in, filling in with new shoots for all the trimming we'd done.

But the following year, oh, that year, we had a bonanza of plums! We ate our fill, gave bags and bags away and still had more. It's been like that ever since. This year, once again, we have a bumper crop. Our one plum tree has produced hundreds of plums!

Now, our tree is 100% organic. I feed it nothing.....nothing! I just gets water and sunshine, that's it. We never use pesticides of any kind in the back yard, not with kids and dogs and cats hanging out there, we couldn't even think about it.

I already invited one neighbor to come and take as much as he wanted and he took about 25 lbs with him. What to do with all these plums???

Well, since we'd just canned a few months ago, I called up my friend, Ruth, and asked her if she were interested in doing another canning session. Luckily, she was. We canned some awesome plum jam. It looks so pretty, because the meat of the fruit is red, it has that really purple plum look to it:

Since we just canned not that long ago, we had a routine down pat and it went really well. We were able to can 2 batches in 4 hours.

I love the idea, that, come winter, I'll have a little bit of summer around to taste!

Updating....

2010-07-06T08:35:00.000-07:00

So, Ralph got a job! That's the upside, the downside is that it is in West Virginia. So, he's off again, he started today. The kids were sad to see him go, but they are so used to Daddy being gone when he's working, they think that's the norm.

One of these days, he'll have a job where he can actually come home from work every night and the kids will think that's strange!

We had a fun 4th of July....running in the sprinklers, making floats, watching fireworks (illegal) in the night sky around our house. Really, there is no reason to go anywhere to watch fireworks, there were at least 4 illegal shows going on around us. The only problem was which way to look at any given time. These were high in the sky professional type fireworks.

After about an hour or so, the kids actually were getting scared, the booming was getting to them, so in we came and they snuggled up in my room and fell asleep.

Canning!!!!

2010-06-05T21:05:00.001-07:00

For the first time, ever, today I canned! Who knew it could be so fun and rewarding!

We made salsa....a lot of chopping but it turned out super tasty.

Yes, even Ralph got in on the act...he really helped out!

My friend, Ruth, who really had a fun time, too.

We also canned strawberry jelly. I have to admit it was off the charts in taste. Ruth said it was like the crack of jellies!

Thanks, Houseparty.com......they provided all the materials.

If you haven't checked out Houseparty.com, you should...you host the party, they provide the product. You have a great time and in this case, I learned a ton!

Memorial Weekend

2010-06-01T11:54:00.000-07:00

We finally had some normal weather this weekend...highs near 80! It doesn't take much for the kids to be happy, just blow up the pool and they are good to go!

We BBQ'd twice this weekend, both times with corn on the side, first we did London Broil and then Tri-tip.

Now we just need this weather to stay around for a while. I had the heater on this morning, can't remember a time EVER that I had the heater on in June. We are back to overcast and cold today.

Quiet Heros and Hope

2010-05-30T09:14:00.000-07:00

Often, stories get forwarded to me, stories about cancer kids, cancer survivors. We virtually know lots of parents of kids who have cancer. Most of the stories are nice, interesting. Every now and then, one just touches my heart. Here is one that touched my heart. It's a speech given by a mom of a child with cancer. She's talking about how us, "cancer moms", moms of kids with cancer, are quiet heroes. I don't consider myself a hero. I did what I had to do. Any mom, of any child who has been diagnosed with cancer, does exactly that...what they have to do to make their child's life as "good" as possible, while they fight the disease.

I never thought that we'd keep on fighting, though, long after Marielle was cancer free...but I've learned that it's the norm. Many kids suffer life long effects from the chemotherapy. But it's a trade off you make willingly....it's not a good trade off, but what can you do? Your options are your child's life or possible long term effects. So you choose what you must choose.

This story is real. The good, the bad, the ugly. But most of all the hope that lives on. And Hope does live on.... warning have your tissues ready.

http://www.acco.org/AboutUs/QuietHeroesTalk.aspx

Update

2010-04-24T09:36:00.000-07:00

Well, I'm 7 weeks out now and I have to tell you that the recovery has been much slower than I expected. I really felt that I'd be back to 100% in less time than they say is needed for recovery. Boy, was I wrong! I am getting stronger every day, but still am nowhere near 100%. I walk every day, strengthening my legs, but boy do I tire easily!

That said, I have made some "field trips" over the last week. Ralph said, 'I could see the cabin fever burning in your eyes". It was true. I was so tired of being at home. So, I went to Home Depot to the garden dept. last weekend. True, I didn't stay long, I knew what I wanted, but I did go and even stood in line at the check out! (Standing for any length of time is still tough.)

I went out to dinner on Thursday night (first time out at a restaurant since the surgery) and last night went for girl's bingo night at a friend's house. So, I finally am working back into having a life!

Updating My Progress

2010-04-12T23:36:00.001-07:00

I saw the surgeon today. They took x-rays and it was very cool to see the x-ray of my hip. I feel so bionic now!

He is pleased with my progress. All restrictions are lifted, though he did give advice on what would not be smart to do (certain flexing to the outside of the hip).

Up until now, post op, I've had to sleep on my back with a wedge between my legs. This was hard! It meant I couldn't move around in my sleep and I'd wake up with a really stiff back. I actually had numbness in the non-op leg because L-3 was getting pinched from the way I was sleeping. Well, tonight I get to lie on my side again!!!! Yippeeeeee!!!

I'll start doing pool therapy next week, which will really help. We've had a lot of rainy days and I'm very cautious (scared of falling) walking outdoors in the rain. I did walk 100 yards the other day when it was sunny (that's the whole length of a football field) without stopping. I thought that was pretty cool.

The biggest thing now is getting strength and stamina back. One thing that he mentioned is that when you have arthritis, you baby that leg and so the muscles atrophy (and he said you'd be surprised how quickly they do). So now, I am back to walking normally and have to get those muscles back in shape.

Overall, I was very happy with my progress and he was, too. Just got to get to work now on getting strong again.

It's my birthday!

2010-04-05T08:20:00.000-07:00

Today is my birthday! What do I wish for?

To be able to walk longer distances without the walker.

For some real spring weather. I need to get my garden in. I can't remember the last time I didn't have my garden planted before my birthday. (This wish goes hand in hand with wishing for some normal spring weather, not this wet, cold stuff we've been having.)

That Ralph will find a real job...a permanent, full time job with benefits.

Continued good health for my entire family.

Moving Right Along

2010-03-26T08:14:00.001-07:00

Well, I'm moving right along with my recovery. I went to the kids school yesterday. Rico had an IEP meeting. I wanted to go to show that, no matter what, when it's my child's education that is involved, I would be there.

It was nice to see the school staff. The meeting went well. Rico has his IEP for speech only, so it was just a matter of talking about goals and setting them up for the next year. By the way, his speech has improved tremendously. When he first went into speech, a little over 3 years ago, he could only say 18 out of 88 sounds tested. Now he only needs work with a few sounds.

I did pay the price for all the walking, though. I had to walk from the car to the office to sign in, then down 2 halls to get to the meeting. Later in the day I was wiped out, and slept for a good 3 hours.

But still, I feel like I'm making good progress!

Hip Replacement Surgery

2010-03-20T11:10:00.000-07:00

So, on March 4th, I had hip replacement surgery on my left hip. That's a little over 2 weeks ago now.

I was in the hospital for 6 days, mostly because they couldn't get their act together to get me transferred to a Skilled Nursing Facility. I should have transferred on Monday, but the hospital sent all the records to the wrong insurance company and didn't realize it until Tuesday, at which point they had to start from scratch. I just got tired of it and Wed morning I decided I was going home...enough of hospitals or any type of facility.

The docs said I had to walk 50 feet and do stairs. Heck I would have jumped if that's what it took. So I did my walking and my stairs, got the ok and came home.

Coming home, I didn't have a lot of energy, strength or stamina. It was hard just to get around the house the first few days. But day by day, I found myself becoming stronger and getting my stamina back.

Overall, I think the recovery is going well. I was outside yesterday (14 days post op) walking with the walker in front of the house. I'm up almost all day now and just feel better every day.

I'm really glad I did the surgery. The hip pain is 100% gone, now I just have the pain related to healing and that's much less than the pain I had before.

Disneyland!

2010-03-01T06:25:00.000-08:00

We took off Wednesday, after school let out and headed down to southern California... The kids played hookie on Thursday and Friday and we visited "the happiest place on earth". It was a blast! The weather was great on Thursday and Friday. They were predicting a "major storm" for Saturday.

Saturday, it rained for about 5 minutes, kind of a downpour and then was dry for 4 hours....that's a major storm??? The great news was...no lines! The rain kept people away and you could come off a ride and go right back on. Even the "Fastpass" was turned off on all the rides...why fastpass when you can go right on?

We had a great time and drove back yesterday...now back to the real world.

2010-01-30T08:42:00.000-08:00

We had a meeting to update Marielle's 504 this week. I think it went pretty well. The school psychologist began so upbeat, "Marielle has improved in all areas, isn't that great?!. Yes, she did improve, but her improvement was much less than her peers. She has fallen from "low average" to "below average". I knew this would happen, I could see it happening, but they won't give services until a child is really far behind. It's very frustrating.

Now, let me say, that I've been working with Marielle at home every day over the last 4 months. This kid works. I mean she works so hard, so much harder than a "normal" kid. Her processing speed is very slow. That means it takes her brain longer to figure out things, then make the plan to write it on the paper, then actually execute what she is going to do...write it down.

To give you an idea....Rico gets a packet of homework for the week. He can complete the entire week's homework in the time it takes Marielle to do one day of homework and that's reduced homework because that was already in place on her last 504.

I have to be very supportive and patient or she will become frustrated with herself.

The good news is that she is more confident and has stopped saying things like "I'm stupid" and "I'm dumb". That's a huge step forward.

Her teacher made the comment that she would not have fallen behind her peers, had she done the homework like them. I mustered all the politeness I could and said, "Marielle is doing an hour of homework a day. She spends 40 minutes doing math and spelling and another 20 minutes reading to me. That's already too much for a second grader, I will not add more burden to her". I think the teacher was taken aback. Good. She really does not realize the homework burden Marielle is carrying.

Ralph and I have talked about getting tutor but honestly, this kid would burn out so quick, adding more home work to the mix. So we'll wait until summer and have her tutored over the summer.

Anyway, back to the meeting. They wanted to put her in Headsprout, a computer learning session. The kids sit at the computer and what's on the computer for 45 minutes. It's a 1 adult to 10 children ratio. I said absolutely not. First off, I've volunteered in Rico's class and know how it goes. It's great for Rico, he loves to read and he sits and read and reads and reads. But for the kids who aren't into reading, well, they look around, get up, talk to other kids, etc. When I volunteered, one of the things I did was constantly say, "Turn around and read your screen, please", "Sit down and read, please".

In a situation like this, Marielle would sit and look at the screen, do nothing and at the end of 45 minutes, have gotten nothing out of it. See, she's not disruptive. She just sits and looks like she's doing her work. Then, when you ask her to turn in her paper, she's done 2 math problems in a half an hour. She won't ask for help, she doesn't look around or get up, she just sits quietly and does nothing. In Headsprout, she'd just get overlooked.

So I asked them what alternatives were available. There is another program called "Early Success" where the ratio is 2 to 1 and they use this specific reading program. It was decided that Marielle would participate 4 days a week, 30 minutes a day. The other good thing about this is that Marielle will be in her classroom for their regular reading session. (With Headsprout, she would have been pulled out at the time the regular classroom reading would occur.) So she'll get a double dose of reading.

I think this is really important, because part of her math problems stem from the fact that they are doing word problems...can't read the words, can't get the answer correctly.

We also put into place accommodations for Marielle for the state tests that are coming up. She will be tested in a small group, may have as many breaks as she needs or asks for, she will have extended time for taking tests and will have repetition of directions.

All in all, I think it was a good meeting. I still don't think that the team realizes that Marielle is sweet, gets along, doesn't disrupt the class, but often sits confused and does nothing. Her teacher did say that she noticed this happening...but what is being done so that this doesn't happen??? Nothing. Marielle won't ask for help, she needs to be prodded. She's shy by nature, add to that the slow processing speed and by the time she realizes she needs help, things have moved on and there is a big, blank void.

It's very frustrating. I wish I had the skills to help her but I don't. We are doing all we can do at home, with reading, math, talking about tricks with math, etc. but it's so hard to see her falling behind still.

Well H@ll

2010-01-13T23:15:00.001-08:00

Ralph called this afternoon. He has been laid off. No reason given. His contract was at will, so they can let him go for no reason.

The good news is he'll be coming home. The bad news is that he's unemployed.....again.

He called back later and told me there was a ferry leaving tomorrow and he'll be on it. It will get him to Prince Rupert, Canada on Friday night. Looks like he'll be home next Wednesday, maybe....might be Thursday, depending on driving conditions (snow and ice) and how long it takes.

I was shocked. Of course, it always happens when you are frazzled already. We had tight schedule...Rico and I got a haircut then we came home and the kids showered. They were just out of the shower when he called. We had a PTA meeting and I was trying to get homework done and dinner going when he called. I didn't say anything to the kids but my mind was spinning.

Our biggest concern is insurance. We actually did continue our COBRA, even though the new insurance was supposed to be effective Jan 1st. The company kept blowing Ralph off and I just had this gut feeling and so paid the premium, thank God. But we are almost out of coverage. I told Ralph that I wondered if they fired him because of the insurance. We had a 3 month wait and were supposed to be effective Jan 1. But they are a really small company, around 30 employees and with the history of a child with cancer, I knew that their premiums would take a big hit. I told Ralph that I wonder if they got the notice that their premiums would skyrocket and so just decided to terminate him. I told him that when he went in to get his final paycheck tomorrow, ask for the insurance card and see what they say. My money is on them saying that the paperwork didn't get in or something like that and that the insurance never went into effect. Want to make a bet on it?

The kids, of course, were over the moon happy. I waited until we were on my bed, snuggling in before bedtime and asked them, "If you had one wish, what would you wish for?" Both answered that they wanted Daddy home for good, not just for a visit. Then I said, "Well, your wish is about to become true!" They were jumping up and down with happiness.

I've decided that everything happens for a reason and there must be some reason here....so I'll hold on and trust in the future...that it will be a good future for us.

Missing him already....

2010-01-03T22:37:00.000-08:00

We drove Ralph off to the airport today...he flew back to work in Alaska. The kids cried all the way home from the airport. I don't blame them, the visit seemed to go by so quickly. I did the best thing I could think of to get their mind off daddy...broke out the chocolate!

I know that they miss him already and so do I.

Happy New Decade!

2009-12-31T22:05:00.001-08:00

And what a decade it was. Looking back on 2000 through 2009, this is what happened.

Our family added 2 children. We traveled to Guatemala 4 times.

We sold our house....we bought a new house. We lost a dog, we added a new dog. Three of our cats died. We added three cats to our household.

We made two trips to Disneyland.....

Marielle was diagnosed with leukemia, went through more than 2 years of chemotherapy, came off treatment and today is happy and thriving.

What a decade.....

Wonder what the next one will bring us....

Much love to all, Happy 2010

The Lappins

The saga of my hip....

2009-12-22T14:22:00.000-08:00

So, long story short, I've had torn cartilage in my hip for the past 8 months. It happened when I had GYN surgery and was under anesthesia. It's painful as all get out. It catches when I sit, but is especially painful when I get out of a sitting position as the frayed end of the cartilage gets caught between the socket and the hip bone.

I saw a specialist at Stanford last week, who does arthroscopic hip surgery. (There are not many docs who do this...only like 11 in the nation). He said I was not a good candidate for the arthroscopic hip surgery, less than 20% chance of success. He recommended a total hip replacement.

Now, I knew I had arthritis in that hip ... I found out after the cartilage tear. It was totally asymptomatic before the tear. But, according to my orthopedist, it's not that bad. He doesn't think a total hip replacement is necessary. He wants to save the hip. I'm all for the least invasive method possible. But...

So, what do we do? The pain is horrid...often debilitating at times. There are times I literally have to lie down for an hour or more, even on pain pills, to get the pain to subside enough for me to be able to walk. It's affecting every area of my life. I'm not a whiner. I have a high tolerance for pain but this thing is knocking me out.

So, today, the ortho and I decided to try a cortisone injection into the hip. If it works, it relieves the pain and buys me time. If it doesn't, well, then we'll figure out a plan B. The injection has to be done at an outpatient surgery center because it's guided by fluoroscope. We'll set it up for early next month.

Wish me luck.....

Christmas Celebrations....

2009-12-21T09:11:00.001-08:00

Our Christmas celebrations began last night. We had a gathering with my Dad. It was a very festive time, gathering with my siblings and their kids (and spouses).

The kids are very excited because there is a new cousin (well great cousin? I guess you'd call him) on the way. My kids are by far the youngest of the bunch and they are thrilled that next year, there will be a new baby at the gathering, thanks to my nephew and his wife.

This is me and my Dad...

The kids were super well behaved, had a great time and were happy to get dressed up and go out.

The holidays are upon us!

Christmas...Hannuka...all that fun stuff...

2009-12-13T21:10:00.000-08:00

Yes, I have a poser...she thinks she's a model... Here she is with her finished gingerbread train:

And here's Rico with his:

We usually do gingerbread houses, but this year I decided to try something different...

Of course, what I didn't think of is that Mr Construction Guy, aka Ralph, isn't here to build the trains, which meant I had to put the gingerbread together.

And lest you think it's easy, even with a kit, it's not....

But I did manage to get them together halfway decently...and the kids had a blast decorating them. That's what counts, right?

Marielle has had pneumonia. She's still getting breathing treatments. Here she is with her mask on getting a nebulizer treatment:

The kids in front of our Christmas tree:

And here are some pictures from the second night of Hannuka...

We really love this time of year!

Bedtime Stories

2009-11-22T00:20:00.000-08:00

I know I'm a horrible blogger. I only write when the spirit moves me and that darned spirit is one lazy son of a gun, so I don't blog that often...

But since Ralph's been gone, Marielle has been sleeping in my bed with me. Every night. Now, I had looked forward to stretching out in the queen size bed, being able to lie any way I wanted and not have another living soul next to me, but Marielle had other ideas. She's concerned about me. She doesn't want me to be lonely at night. (It's very lonely sleeping alone at night, did you know that? Just as Marielle. When she's in her bed, there are no less than 25 stuffed animals on the bed with her every night so she won't get lonely.)

Have you ever slept with a 7 year old in your bed? Here's the thing...they move....a lot. They don't know about the "your side of the bed" rule. They don't realize that people normally sleep with their head at one end and their feet at the other. Oh, and Marielle is a "whapper". She likes to flail her arms around when she sleeps. She lifts them up and the allows them to come crashing down and believe it or not, half the time, at least,one lands on my face. Not fun, being woken up by a hand landing on your face in the middle of the night.

But, you know what else? One of the best things about having Marielle sleep with me, is when I crawl into bed. I'll lie there and look at that sweet, innocent, sleeping face. She looks so little, so young, as she sleeps. All the baby memories flood back to me. I have to really control myself, not to hug her. What is it about a sleeping child? It just moves my heart.

And you know what else? Both my kids are solid sleepers. I mean solid. I can turn on the light, turn on the TV, the dogs can bark, the phone can ring and they don't wake up, they sleep right through. But, when I crawl into bed, at least 3 times a week, as I'm lying there, drifting off to sleep, a little hand reaches out and holds on to mine, and I fall asleep hand in hand with Marielle. It's like she has mommy radar. She really doesn't wake up, she never remembers it in the morning, but there it is, that little hand grabbing mine.

Now, how can I not love that?!

Fun with the microscope

2009-11-09T23:12:00.000-08:00

So Rico got a microscope for his birthday and this evening we were having a lot of fun with it. We looked at blood, saliva, salt crystals, hair and the mouth parts of a honey bee. The last one grossed them out the most. I just know it's going to be a fun activity we'll do over and over again.

SST meeting today....

2009-11-05T11:07:00.000-08:00

Here's how it went....

It was agreed that Marielle does not qualify for an IEP at this point in time. However, it is very likely that at some future point in time, she will be eligible. In other words, her tests are not bad enough at this point to qualify her for an IEP. But, as you know, her problems will continue to impact her learning, and it is very likely that she'll need the IEP in the future, as work becomes more difficult.

We did arrange a 504 for Marielle, which includes:

extra time to complete work

reduced homework and classwork...teacher will highlight problems/tasks that Marielle needs to complete

10 minutes per day of reading intervention with an paraprofessional to work on reading fluency and phonetic elements

Marielle will be able to take a break in the office, if she becomes anxious or overwhelmed(An adult will direct this, when Marielle says she feels sick.)

Marielle will work weekly with the school psychologist (to help her learn self advocacy...to identify how she feels when she's overwhelmed or doesn't understan things)

Preferential seating at the front/center of the classroom

Teacher will give visual and verbal prompts to help her stay on task

Teacher will repeat directions to Marielle and then have Marielle repeat them back to the teacher, to make sure she understands them.

Marielle will be retested (all children are routinely retested) in January and we will meet again after those tests to review determination for eligibility for IEP.

Marielle's tests scores were all over the map...not showing anything as far as strengths or weaknesses.

I think it went well....we got accommodations and the chance to revisit in a couple of months. I feel ok with it.

In some ways, this feels a lot like when Marielle was first diagnosed with cancer...a bunch of professionals speaking Greek and you are trying to understand what it all means and how it applies to your child. Welcome to the educational system. Not fun at all.

I want to also mention that we did hire an advocate and thanks to her help, it was much easier to understand and navigate through the system.

Ok so I've been remiss....

2009-10-31T21:10:00.000-07:00

I haven't updated in forver....

Rico had a birthday...he's 6 now and very excited because 6 is SO much better than 5!

We went to Chuck E Cheese and then came home and had cake.

And, of course, today is Halloween....We have a Candy Corn Witch and Luigi from the Mario Brothers. They had a blast Trick or Treating, got lots of candy and then came home and helped give out candy.

We gave out every single piece of candy we had! 5 big bags worth and the kids still kept coming. We had to blow out the pumpkins and turn out the lights. We've never had so many kids!

But Marielle and Rico had a blast....the best Halloween ever!

Update

2009-10-17T07:23:00.000-07:00

I haven't written much because I don't like too much out in a public forum....at least not until things are settled. We are preparing for Marielle's IEP meeting at the end of this month. This has taken a lot of my time but I know that we will be going in as prepared as anyone can be.

Her teacher told me at her parent teacher conference that she is "not working to her capabilities" which leads me to believe that the teacher does not recognize that Marielle has a disability but instead thinks she is being a slacker....not a fun place for Marielle or myself to be.

Send some love our way...because we need it!

What's going on...

2009-10-11T09:05:00.000-07:00

I haven't written much because there isn't much to write about.

We are starting to get into a routine with Ralph gone. It's weird, not having him here again, but we are all getting used to it.

We continue to have difficulties with Marielle and school and hopefully we can work them out.

Rico is thriving at school, is so into school, reading, math, etc., it's really fun to see.

Winter is about to come, as we are expecting our first storm of the season. We haven't seen rain, but for one day, since about May, so I'm actually looking forward to it. I can't wait to make my first fire in the fireplace.

I've got some kind of bug...I don't think it's the flu because I haven't had a fever, but otherwise feel like I got hit by a truck...body aches are the worst, stuffed up, sore throat...same thing most people around here who are sick are experiencing.

Foo-Foo and Fuzzy's Great Adventure

2009-10-05T12:56:00.000-07:00

Ralph took one stuffed animal from each of the kids up to Alaska with him. They picked one out,and had him take it, so Daddy wouldn't be lonely so far away from home. Before he left, I told him to take pictures of the stuffies on the trip north.

He emailed them to me on Saturday and I made a book on Saturday night, after the kids went to bed called, [U]Foo-foo and Fuzzy's Great Adventure[/U]. The kids were happily surprised when they got up on Sunday to see all the things that Foo-Foo and Fuzzy had seen. It's really cute...starts out with them belted into the passenger seat on the truck, there were pictures of them near signs of towns that DH had stopped in, with totem poles, looking out the window on the ferry to Juneau. Really a fun way to show the kids the trip that Daddy took.

I told Ralph that he needs to take more pictures now, so we can continue the story and so that the kids can see what Juneau is like.

Alaska!

2009-09-27T08:42:00.000-07:00

So Ralph got a job....it's a one year contract, which is great. The only downside is that the job is in Alaska. So he left on Thursday and is currently in Canada, at Prince Rupert and today he gets on the ferry that will take him to Juneau.

I sometimes wonder if people who have pretty safe jobs even realize that there is a recession going on. I know this, people are shocked when they get laid off and then even more shocked when they realize how hard it is to get a job right now. See, even if a company is doing all right, they aren't hiring. People hear on the news that the unemployment rate in CA is what....10%, 11%? But do they realize what that translates to in actual people who want to work who are just unable to find a job?

Ralph retired from the Coast Guard in January, 2008. He would have liked to stay in, he was on active duty for the last 8 years, but he had too many years in, so he had to retire. In 2008, he worked a total of 5 months after retiring. By the way, we get no retirement benefits. He was in the CG for 34 years, but only 15 of those were active duty, so no retirement benefits until he is 60.

So he went up to Alaska last year for 5 months, the only work he could find. Then he came home and tried to find something locally. After about 6 months, he realized that there was nothing going on locally, so he broadened his search nationally. Finally, he found another job in Alaska.

Construction, especially large construction projects, are just not happening right now in CA. And even if they are getting funded, there are so many people lining up for those few jobs that it's pretty near impossible to get one.

We are very lucky in that we always have lived the life of saving. Always lived below our means and socked money into the bank. We have no debt, except our mortgage. I wonder how many people can say that, after having the breadwinner out of work for a year? That doesn't mean it's been easy. It hasn't been. But we made it. And now we have income again. And now we'll start to replenish our depleted savings accounts.

Brownies...

2009-09-21T20:52:00.000-07:00

We went to a Brownie meeting today to see if Marielle would be interested in joining. It was rather chaotic...first meeting of the year and then I guess last year the Daisy and Brownie troop met in the same room and today the Daisy leader decided they need to break apart and have separate meetings, which just added to the chaos. The talked about what activities they wanted to do as the year went on, but they didn't have a specific activity for this meeting and Marielle was rather unsure about joining. Then, as the parents talked, the kids all started playing tag. After that, Marielle decided she did want to join.

So, looks like there's going to be a Brownie in the house....

Let's Go Fly a Kite!

2009-09-20T19:11:00.001-07:00

It was a perfect day for kite flying today...the weather was in the high 70's with a nice, stiff breeze coming off the Marina.

Ralph got the kites up into the air and then the kids took very short turns holding them. I really think that Ralph was the only one who flew a kite for more than 3 minutes.

But it was a lot of fun, anyway!

Monday, Monday...

2009-09-14T19:39:00.000-07:00

Well, the good news is that Marielle had a blood draw today and everything came back perfect. Whew, a load off my mind. It's so hard, having had a child with cancer, when they aren't feeling good and the symptoms are nonspecific....head hurts, tummy-ache, sore throat, not eating, throwing up....

I flashback and think, "Oh NO" but with the blood results today, I feel much better.

We still don't know if Ralph has a job up in Alaska...we are hopeful and should hear very soon.

I haven't written much...

2009-09-12T06:00:00.000-07:00

Because Marielle is still feeling a bit under the weather, we are getting used to the new school year routine, I've been pulling my hair out about Marielle's teacher's attitude but don't like to put anything out there for everyone to read....

I'm stressed because Ralph might have a job....that's a good thing, but it would mean a year away from us, up in Alaska, that's stressful and my hip is getting better but my knee on the other side isn't.

See why I'm not writing? Just hate to whine....

Memory Problems

2009-08-30T07:33:00.000-07:00

It has become more and more apparent to us that Marielle has short term memory problems....or maybe I'm just more aware of them or maybe she's not trying to hide it any more.

Prior to her neuropsych testing, she would try to hide it. In one blaring case, she and her brother had gone to Sunday School. They get a dollar each to buy a snack at the break. School is 2 hours and after an hour they break, have a snack and then resume.

When they got home, I asked Rico what he had for break and he said, "Oreos". When I asked Marielle she said she had Oreos, too. Rico said, "No you didn't you had goldfish". It was her response that gave her away. A normal kid would have said something like, "Oh yeah, I forgot, I had goldfish". Marielle said to Rico, which I overheard, "I can't remember what I had, so I'm going to say Oreos and you are going to back me up".

Talk about being hit over the head with a hammer. This response told me that not only did she not remember, but that she had been having a problem with memory for a while and had developed "survivor skills" to cover up the fact that she couldn't remember things.

Prior to this, her teacher had mentioned a number of times to me that she thought Marielle should be sent for testing, that at times she seemed like she "wasn't really there", her mind wandering. Well, after that, we set up testing with the school and the an independent neuropsychologist.

I told her that we knew she was having memory problems, that it was ok, that sometimes the medicine that kids get to get rid of the leukemia can cause problems and that they (the psychologists) were just going to have her do some worksheets and ask her some questions, so they could help her learn better and help her learn how to improve her memory.

On Tuesday (the day after the first day of school, not wanting to overwhelm her teacher on the first day), in Marielle's backpack, I sent a letter to her new teacher and copies of both reports. They were in a big manila folder and I ask Marielle to give them to her teacher. In addition, I mentioned to the teacher, while Marielle was in line, that Marielle had something for her and would she be sure to take it out of the back pack. I also included a copy of the book Educating the Child with Cancer with a note that I'd like the teacher to read the part about Late Cognitive Effects. Actually, I had reminded Marielle about them a couple of times and told her each time that they were for her teacher and when she turned in her folder, she should turn them in, too.

Well, Marielle comes home and here is the manila folder and the book. She had walked home and it made her backpack quite heavy to trudge home. I asked Marielle why she still had them...why didn't she give them to the teacher and she burst into tears and said, "I didn't know what to do with them, Mama, I didn't know what to do!"

I guess the good thing is that she is being more open and honest with me that she doesn't remember instructions. On the downside, it's very hard, as a mom, to witness this.

We have a meeting in the upcoming week to discuss 504/IEP plans with the school. Wish us luck.

Ok, this is funny!

2009-08-28T03:13:00.000-07:00

Look behind Marielle on the right side....see the boy whose head is in the picture?

Well, I posted this pic on Facebook and got a note from his mom, who we know! See her husband took her kids and my husband took my kids and then they sat right next to each other and never introduced themselves. Had they done so, they would have realized that we know each other.

We'd met at the Relay For Life...

Funny, huh!

First Major League Baseball Game

2009-08-25T23:10:00.001-07:00

Tonight, Ralph took the kids to their first major league baseball game, the Giants vs. the Diamondbacks. It was a gathering made possible by Make A Wish for kids who have had or have cancer. They had a meet and greet with some of the Giants players before the game. Of course, Marielle was too shy to go over to any of the players, so I don't have any pictures with her and the players. She decided that Lou Seal, the Giants mascot, was safe, so here's a picture of them with him.

The giant coke bottle in the background houses 4 slides....2 forty feet slides and 2 twenty feet slides. The kids were too scared to try them.

They lasted exactly 3 innings before they wanted to come home. But, there was a home run in the second inning and for some reason, Rico felt he should have caught that ball. Maybe it's because he knows I have caught a ball at a major league game. (It was at Candlestick, the old ball park and it was a foul ball, none the less, I caught it fair and square and do still brag about it.)

The kids got pizza and drinks before the game, care of Make a Wish, which was nice. But I was a bit disappointed that there were no souvenirs....not a ball or a hat or anything. When the A's players came to Children's Hospital when Marielle was inpatient, they were very generous with the souvenirs, handing out balls and hats and such.

Still and all, they had a good time and I guess that's the most important thing.

Where was I? At Book Club!

First Day of School

2009-08-25T12:08:00.000-07:00

So yesterday was the first day of school. It went really well. Rico is now in first grade and Marielle is in second.

Marielle was thrilled that I let her pick her outfit to wear. She wanted to look really "rockerish". Rico could care less about what he wore, except that he got to wear his new shoes, which we bought last week and I told him had to wait for the first day of school to be worn.

Of course, both kids were thrilled with their new back packs.

Today was really sweet, though. We had all the school supplies to bring along, so both Ralph and I went to drop them off. Ralph was with Marielle and I was with Rico. As the bell rang and the teachers came out, I went over to Marielle's teacher to let her know that I'd put some things for her in Marielle's back pack. (I gave her a copy of the book Educating the Child with Cancer and copies of her neuropsych test and school psychologist test results.)

So the kids went into their classrooms and I was standing and chatting with some of the moms, when all of a sudden, across the play area, Rico's teacher waves to me and then Rico comes out. He is crying. I come over and he said, "You left and didn't give me a hug or a kiss". So I walk him back in, holding his little hand and give him a hug and a kiss. Then I stand there for about 30 seconds and he looks at me and says, "Ok, go now".

Houseparty!

2009-08-22T16:28:00.000-07:00

Have you heard of this site? Here's the addy: http://www.houseparty.com

Why am I mentioning it? Because it's a great site. You sign up to host parties for different things...they have all kinds of parties available. From toys to TV shows to food. Then, if you are chosen, they send you a party pack. In it are all kinds of goodies. Then you have a party and let them know what you thought of it. That's it. No catch. Sounds good, huh?

So, we hosted our first ever house party. It was awesome.

Here's a wonderful recipe with tuna, feta cheese, garlic and tomatoes. I made half without tomatoes because Ralph and Rico don't like tomatoes.

I made these cool finger sandwiches...they are made with a seasoned tuna medley that has sun dried tomatoes and basil mixed into the tuna, in a pop top type of can. You just open and make the sandwich...easy and they were really good.

Here's a recipe I made with tuna, tomatoes, olives, and pasta. It used the same tuna sensation product and turned out tasting really good.

The kids loved every one of the recipes I made, which actually surprised me.

Now, I have to tell you, I'm not a tuna type of person. I mean, it's ok, it's just not my favorite food. But I really loved the recipies that we got with the party package and was really impressed because not only did the adults love the food, the kids did, too.

So, let's see....we got free food, party favors, got to have a party and try new food and all for free! Sounds like a good deal to me!

More Kittens....

2009-08-20T16:42:00.000-07:00

I have no idea why they think the scooba is comfortable! But they craw up on it and sleep. (It's a robot floor washer.)

They are almost old enough to move on to their new homes.

In the meantime, they have been exploring all over the house. You never know where you might find one.

They are cute as heck, too.

Marielle will be especially sad when they leave. She loves holding them and walking around with them and playing with them.

A Day At The Museum

2009-08-19T16:02:00.001-07:00

We went to the Rosicrucian Museum today. The kids were pretty impressed. Well, except for Rico and one part.

They had an actual replica of a tomb. You had to walk into this dark cave to get to it. Rico was fine at first...Marielle held back. Rico said, "It's not bad, come on Marielle" and forged ahead.

Then he turned the corner to a much darker area and started crying. What we didn't realize was that there was a tour ahead of us with a docent giving a speech about the walls of the tomb. So here's Rico crying and a number of old biddies (sorry, but they were) shushing him. I gave him a hug, pulled him to a lighter area and he was fine.

But now, I just have to kid him about going back to the museum and spending the night to get him to behave!

It really was very interesting to the kids. This is the first "real" museum they'd been to.

They loved the grounds, too.

Clinic Day

2009-08-17T13:16:00.001-07:00

Even though Marielle has been off treatment for nearly 2 years now, I still get nervous every time we have the blood draw and clinic visit. But, as has been our experience over the past 21 months, her visit was good, her blood perfect! So, we are done for another 3 months!

Five weeks old today

2009-08-08T16:11:00.000-07:00

And it doesn't get any cuter than this!

"I didn't do it, I swear, I didn't hit her".....

They are running all around our room, discovering all kinds of new "playthings"...

Did you know cats are nocturnal? They love to wake us up at night to play. They have learned how to climb up onto the bed.

But how can you get mad at a face like this?

Julie and Julia

2009-08-07T13:53:00.000-07:00

Great movie! Ralph and I went together (a rarity) to see this movie today. Nothing like "sneaking" out to a movie in the middle of the day while both kids are in camp!

We both loved it! Very cute, very sweet...it holds your attention and is just fun. So if you get a chance, go see it. I don't have to say that Meryl Streep is fantastic as Julia Childs. She could play anyone and be great. And the perky little gal from Enchanted, Amy Adams is great, much more "laid back" and less perky than in other films I've seen her in. Very believable.

Anyway, go see it!

Summer Fun!!!

2009-08-01T20:51:00.000-07:00

What's more fun than bumper cars???

BUMPER BOATS!!!!!

The kids had a blast on them....

And why are they better than bumper cars?? Because you can squirt the other boaters!

Many thanks to my SIL, Pat, for taking on both Rico and Marielle as team mates.

And what else says summer fun, like mini golf?

We had a really great day, filled with lots of fun.

Then, we hopped over to Jelly Belly for some candy. Ahhh....perfect summer day.

Nails, cont...

2009-07-30T07:57:00.000-07:00

Well, Marielle remains enthralled by her new nails and is not biting or picking at them. Yeah! I told her if she leaves them alone, her regular nails will grow out underneath the fake ones and when we get the fake ones taken off, she can have a manicure on her real (and by then long) nails.

She likes this idea, but I think she likes the fake ones better.

Nails!

2009-07-28T18:15:00.000-07:00

So Marielle has had this nervous habit. It started when she was diagnosed with cancer. She bites and picks at her nails and cuticles....so badly that they often bleed. She'll bite them down below the quick...ouch! As you can see in the "before" picture, her nails are very, very short.

I've tried to get her to stop but nothing seems to work. So, I told her I'd let her get fake nails, if she promised to take care of them and not pick or bite them. I figured that plastic wouldn't give her the same gratification.

So today, we both went for manicures. I'd never had a manicure before in my life! I get my hands dirty so much in the garden and the yard, doing dishes, etc. and my nails are hard and grow well on their own. But, hey, if she's going to get her nails done, Mama should, too, right? I loved the manicure (no fake nails for me) . Marielle is in heaven over her new nails! She picked the color so that she would look like a "rocker girl"! Let's hope she cares for them ok!

Marielle was very calm and super patient, by the way, even amazing that gal that did the manicure. I doubt that many 7 year olds are as patient as she is. But having practically grown up at the hospital and clinic, she's used to waiting for long periods of time.

Duck Eggs

2009-07-23T14:18:00.000-07:00

So we had the duck eggs with dinner last night. They were very tasty! They are basically similar to chicken eggs, but the yolk is bigger, so the egg is richer. I made mine sunny side up and it was delish! The kids had theirs scrambled and they loved them. (Then they tried to eat my egg because they said it looked better cooked that way but I didn't let them have it...bwaaahhhh. I'm such a mean mommy.)

We will definitely get duck eggs again in the future. I'm going to make a quiche for dinner tonight with some of the eggs (chicken). I found a good recipe on the net...bacon, tomato and leek quiche. Doesn't that sound good? I also found another one that uses salsa and sausage, but want to tweak it to add veggies but haven't decided how to do it yet.

The kids have always enjoyed quiche and fritatas (basically quiche without the crust) and it's great that we have this new source for wonderfully fresh, great tasting eggs.

I am sure we'll take a trek out to the farm again in the not too distant future.

Visiting the Farm

2009-07-22T16:55:00.000-07:00

We went to a local farm today. Now, we are "city slickers" and the kids haven't had much experience to farm life, so for them, it was a great adventure.

We went to get some farm fresh eggs. They had all kinds of eggs. We came home with green eggs, brown eggs, white eggs and some duck eggs. I've never had duck eggs before, but we are going to have some for dinner tonight. I wonder how different they'll taste.

The cool part was that the kids got to hunt for the eggs themselves.

Marielle went for it and found us lots of eggs.

Rico, on the other hand, didn't want to put his hand into a space he wasn't sure of. I think he thought that the mama hen was going to come over and peck his hand off if he tried to take an egg. Despite reassurances, he wouldn't pick up any eggs. Well, not until I pulled them out of the nesting area! Then he wanted to juggle them. (No, he was not allowed to do that!)

Then we went and visited some of the horses, cows, and a goat. Marielle was cool with the animals, Rico was scared.

All in all, it was a really fun time!

We'll go back again to get more eggs, after we eat the ones we got today. The nice thing about it, is that the farm is actually really close to us, not more than 20 minutes away. It's Manhattan Farms in Castro Valley, off Crow Canyon Rd. for anyone who is local and thinking they'd like to go. The owners are super nice and the kids had a great experience!

Kitten Love

2009-07-21T23:56:00.001-07:00

The kittens are now 2 weeks old and looking more "kittenish" by the day. They are starting to bat and play.

They wander a bit further from Mama Cat...

But they still like being in a group best...

Well, I think they like cuddling with Mama Cat the best...

How cute are they?

Fun in the Summer Sun

2009-07-18T08:31:00.001-07:00

We had a great time yesterday, getting together with "internet friends", friends who I'd met on an internet site and have corresponded with for years. The kids all swam and laughed and the gals just had a blast chatting it up.

The weather was great and everyone had a great time.

They concede

2009-07-13T18:55:00.000-07:00

"They concede, they concede" is what I thought my husband said as he came running from the bedroom. "Who conceded?", is what I asked.

Uh, no, he was saying, "They can see"....the kittens eyes have opened up. Here's the proof.

Beach time!

2009-07-12T17:04:00.001-07:00

Great weather, good friends, what a great day!

Kitten update

2009-07-11T10:12:00.000-07:00

The kittens are now a week old and growing day by day. They have started purring, which is so cute. As they suckle at their mama, you can hear the little purrs and it's very sweet. There eyes should open sometime in the next week.

The black and white one is the most mellow of all the kittens. You can hold him and he could care less. He's also the biggest. The little calico is the smallest.

Kittens!!!

2009-07-04T12:52:00.001-07:00

Kids today, what are you going to do with them? (Note the one on Mama's head.)

It began last night, around dinner time. The Mama cat, her name is Princess Daisy (named after the Mario Kart character) was excessively licking herself and didn't want to let me out of her sight. Ok, I knew that meant it was nearly time.

Well, all night long it went on. She was purring, cuddling, restless. I dozed fitfully and finally fell into a deep sleep around 3 am, Mama on the bed with me. Around 6 am, she woke me to tell me it was time. The first kitten was delivered around 6:30 am and the last at 9:am. In all, she delivered 5 kittens, with one being born still. All the surviving ones are mostly black, one is black and white and one is calico with black being the predominant color.

Mama and babies are doing well. Marielle and Rico are very excited. They can't wait for the kittens to be old enough to play with.

Skin Color and Michael Jackson

2009-07-03T01:38:00.000-07:00

Being a mixed race family, we often have discussions on skin and hair color. Sometimes the kids want us to all be alike. For a while, they insisted that Daddy was brown, like them. Then Rico announced that he was, in fact, peach like me, not brown skinned. I usually just let these ideas play out and don't give too much input one way or another. Let them find their way in our family and in our world.

So today, I was a bit surprised when Rico came in, followed by Marielle and asked me, "Mama, Marielle says that when Michael Jackson was little, he was brown, not peach. Is that true?" I said yes, that is true. Then Rico asked how he went from brown to peach. I told him I didn't really know for sure, but cosmetic surgery was involved and maybe other stuff like creams to lighten his skin.

Then Marielle said, 'Mom, he looked so much better when he was brown. When he was peach, he....he....he just looked weird".

Ah yes, a learning moment! I told her she was absolutely correct. We talked about how sometimes, people don't like the way they look, be it skin color or hair color or shape of their nose or whatever. And they try to change it. Sometimes, they look better because of the change. But sometimes, well, they just look a whole lot worse. And maybe, it's better to just be happy with the way you look because that's the way that you look, than to try and change it.

I hope the lesson sunk in.

Are you sure she's not just fat?

2009-06-29T08:18:00.000-07:00

That's the question I've been hearing a lot lately. You see, our cat is pregnant. She is due right around July 3, give or take a day or 2. Cats gestation is 63 days and we know when she went into heat and was out. We haven't allowed one of our cats to have kittens in 14 years....a long time. But we decided we'd let Princess Daisy (named after the Mario Kart character and Rico's cat) to have one litter before we got her fixed.

She was very thin when she got pregnant and is fat but not hugely fat right now. I'm guessing a litter of 3 kittens and will be surprised if there are more. The last time we allowed a litter, Butterscotch had 6 kittens for her first and only litter...she was a huge ball of cat before she delivered. Daisy is no where near as big.

But, I find it funny that Marielle still doesn't really believe that Daisy will be having kittens. We thought it would be a good learning experience for the kids and so far it has been. They've asked how the kittens will come out and I've explained it. Thank goodness they haven't asked how they got in there!

2009-06-28T10:10:00.000-07:00

Rico is very shy and has no fun whatsoever.....

It will be sizzling here today...at 9 am it was almost 80 degrees, warmer than the high temp here most days....

The kids had breakfast and headed out to the pool...

What a great way to beat the heat....

As for me, I'm parked inside the air conditioned house....

Learning to read

2009-06-28T06:55:00.000-07:00

So last night, Rico reads the book Wall-E as his book. Now, it was Daddy's night with reading, I was in the kitchen puttering around. Rico reads his book in 3 minutes. But, then again, it's the 5 words on a page kind of book with some pages only having pictures.

Half an hour later, I realize that Marielle is struggling through her book. Wait a minute? It should not take this long for her to read a book on her reading level. So I asked what she was reading... Skippyjon Jones and the Mummy Trouble. That's a bit above her reading level. So I tell them to stop, she's read enough and Ralph says they are almost done.

Later, as we are cuddling in bed, I tell Marielle she gets credit for reading 2 books, because that was a hard book and a lot longer than her brother's book. Then I tell her to choose easier books. And she says to me, "Mom, I want hard books. I want to read more and learn the hard words because I want to be a good reader".

Sometimes that girl just pulls my heart strings. She tries so hard. Things that come easy to her brother, aren't coming easy to her but man, is she a fighter! And the way she's going, she's going to be a good reader, too.

What's going on...

2009-06-25T06:51:00.000-07:00

The kids are at camp this week....Book Camp. They come up with an idea, write the story and then illustrate it and at the end of the week, they have a book they made themselves. They seem to be really enjoying it. They've had art classes the last 2 years with the same teacher . This is the first time they've done a camp with her, though. For Rico, it's a longer day than he's used to, since the camp goes 9-3, but he'd handling it like a champ.

Our weather finally is nice and we set up the blow up pool in the back yard. Which means that, after spending 6 hours at camp, when the kids come home, they don't want to even talk to me, it's change clothes and frolic in the pool for 2 hours. Life is sweet!

Ralph is home for now, back from his training in VA.

My leg continues to give me pain...I am muddling through as best I can.

Just so you can see how far we've come...

2009-06-21T08:23:00.001-07:00

Marielle at the first Relay for Life that we attended. Her hair was just growing back in and her legs hurt so much from the vincristine that Daddy had to carry her much of the day.

You've come a long way, my girl!

Relay for Life

2009-06-20T15:22:00.000-07:00

Today we participated in our 4th Relay for Life. I can't believe it! You never know what you'll see at the Relay. Marielle loved this dog...he's too cool.

Once again, we got to hang out with "Postcard Cindy", an awesome woman, who was very helpful today. She did laps with the kids and helped them get lunch. My leg is in no shape to do laps around the field. Cindy is awesome, sends postcards to sick kids and is a sweet, sweet lady. She also gave each of the kids a webkinz. They loved that.

We were on Team Ali once again. This is Marey, Ali's mom. The little girl next to her is one of her students and she is also a cancer survivor. Ali had the same kind of leukemia Marielle had and is now 2 years Off Treatment. She wasn't there because she is working at UCSF this summer and had a commitment today. Marielle really wanted to see Ali.

The Relay began with the youngest and oldest survivors cutting the ribbon. This is Marielle with the oldest survivor.

Here is Marielle with her ribbons from all the Relays. Oh, and she wanted me to mention that she won the race again. She and Maia and Rico ran the whole way, beating the oldest survivor on the survivor lap. LOL

Flashback to the '70's

2009-06-17T21:30:00.000-07:00

So Marielle and Rico were playing Wii Fit and decided that they really needed sweatbands to continue to play it, so off ran Marielle, grabbing head bands and making them into sweatbands.

They thought they were the coolest thing. I love the picture on the right by the way, because Marielle is hiding behind Rico and it kind of looks like he has '70's long hair.

Just had to say

2009-06-14T23:04:00.001-07:00

That Marielle is now up to 5 books read and is ahead of my "reader", Rico, who has only read 4 books. Marielle is jazzed. I am just happy that she is into the whole "read 20 books, get your webkinz" thing.

Who stole my daughter....

2009-06-13T09:53:00.001-07:00

And replaced her with a reader???

Marielle, who hates reading, who cries when I tell her she has to sit and read to me, got up today, got 2 books, read one and then read the other one to me. Two books before 9 am! I can hardly believe it.

But, on the other hand, motivation....

I told both kids to pick out a new webkinz. Marielle picked the guinea pig. She would love to have a real life guinea pig, but that's not happening, so she was thrilled that there was a new webkinz guinea pig. Rico picked out the porcupine. Then I told them that I would buy them but they were mine until they read 20 books. When 20 books were read, the webkinz were theirs to adopt. Oh yes, and yesterday I pulled them out and showed the animals to them and then packed them away until the books were read.

I made up a book list on the computer and printed one out for each and we started yesterday with Rico reading 2 books and Marielle reading 1. They each wrote the name of the book on the list after they read it.

I guess Marielle is inspired by her webkinz and really, really wants it. Great! I'll buy more webkinz if it motivates her to read! Here's to a summer full of reading!

There are no guidelines for moments like these...

2009-06-11T09:30:00.000-07:00

So a couple of days ago, we were sitting on the couch, watching the news and Marielle says to me, out of the blue, "I miss cancer. I wish I had it again". Ok, big knee jerk reaction from me... I said, "No, don't ever wish you had it again. Be happy you don't have it anymore. Children DIE of cancer".

Uh, oh. We had never actually let Marielle know before that kids can die of cancer. I didn't think it was something a 3 then 4 then 5 year old needed to know while she battled cancer over 2+ years. Yes, children we knew died and yes, she knew that children we knew had died but she never made that connection, that it was the cancer that made the children die.

Fast forward to last night, cuddling on my bed at bedtime and Marielle starts crying and saying she doesn't want to die. Oh man. So I tell her that nobody wants to die, but eventually everyone does die, but hopefully it's when they are very, very old. I even use examples of my dad (who is in his 70's and doing well) and Ralph's Dad who died a couple of years ago in his mid 90's.

Then she starts asking me questions about funerals.... "Will they bury me in the ground? Will I be able to take things into the coffin with me? Will I have a headstone?" Oh my GOD! Where did she hear this stuff? Both Ralph's parents were cremated...no casket, no headstone. We've never talked about funerals because quite honestly, our families aren't "the norm". Most of the folks have been cremated and the ashes scattered or interred very much later. (Ralph's moms ashes were only interred 15 years after she died and after Ralph's dad died.)

Then she starts asking about heaven and who she'll see in heaven....uh, again, where is this coming from? Her religious teaching have been Jewish and Jews don't have heaven.

I'm thinking a mile a minute, trying to answer her questions and put her at ease. She's asking if I can be buried with her, not next to her but can they open the coffin and put us together because she doesn't want to be alone when she dies and she'll wait for me but it will be lonely....and then when I die we can be together...

I keep trying to reassure her, she's crying, Ralph who is also on the bed is saying nothing...not one word, nada, nothing. Later, when I ask him why he didn't say anything he says, 'Well, you were handling it ok, what did you want me to say? Besides, you think faster than me."

So then Marielle asks why we have to die at all. And I tell her that if no people died, there could be no babies. See the world would just fill up with people and no new people could come into the world because it would be too full. She loved that answer. She said, "Ok, then, Mom, it's ok that I die. Because I love babies and I want babies and the world needs babies" I feel much better now. I don't want to talk about dying anymore."

These are the conversations that nothing can prepare you for. I really hope I did it "right" whatever that means. I don't want her worrying about dying or obsessing over it. I did want to give her honest answers, no sugar coating, but I don't want her to be afraid.

An Adoption Story...present day

2009-06-08T11:47:00.000-07:00

So often you hear of people's reaction to a child being adopted and it's negative....well, maybe not negative, but not exactly overwhelmingly positive. Yes, I've had the "how much did they cost?" questions and others but never have I had someone be super glad to hear that my kids were adopted!

Since Rico started Kindergarten, his best friend has been Gabe. I hear "Gabe this and Gabe that" all the time. We've often seen Gabe and his family at school functions but never had Gabe over for a play date. Well, with school coming to an end, Rico really wanted Gabe to come over. So a couple of times, when Ralph picked up the kids he mentioned it to Gabe's mom. Then he gave her his card and ask that she call me to arrange a play date.

We hadn't heard from her, not sure why, but I didn't want to let the ball drop because Rico really, really wanted to have Gabe come over. (Ralph has been picking up the kids most days because my hip has been very painful. If I have to pick up the kids, I have to walk a ways to the gate and I can't take a pain pill and most afternoons, by pick up time, my hip is so bad I have to take something.)

Anyway, Gabe's mom finally allowed Gabe to come over last Friday, after school. It was a shortened day and so Gabe came over, had lunch and played for about an hour and a half. When she came to get Gabe, I asked her in and she came in just for a couple of minutes. I wanted her to see our house, know that we are "normal" folks and feel comfortable letting Gabe come over again.

She told me that she knew that she was being overprotective of Gabe, but that's just how she was, she couldn't help it. I told her I understood, it's hard when your "baby" is going out to friend's homes. Then she asked me in a very nice way about Marielle's hair and which side of the family she got that from. I laughed and said that both Marielle and Rico were adopted and that they are Guatemalan.

The response I got, was by far, the best response I've ever received upon telling someone that my children were adopted. She hugged me and said, "Oh, I feel so much better now. Gabe can come over anytime! I know what kind of background check you have to go through to adopt, you must be good people."

She then explained that she and her husband are foster parents, they don't currently have any kids but they obviously know about fostering and adopting (they'd love to adopt through fost/adopt) and we bonded pretty quickly.

I must say, though, that I was really happily bowled over by such a great response to my statement that my kids were adopted.

Funny, true story....

2009-06-06T17:15:00.000-07:00

Marielle had her clinic visit on Monday. Ralph took her this time. Now, it's been quite a while since Ralph had taken Marielle to clinic, at least a year, maybe longer. I sent Ralph with a list of questions that I wanted answered by the Oncologist and he did really well, getting answers to all but one on the list.

The next day, I called the clinic and spoke with our favorite nurse practitioner about the one unanswered question. She then relayed this story to me:

Ralph signed Marielle in and then had to sign consent forms, as you need to sign new ones every 12 months and it was our turn. Then the receptionist came back and told the nurse practitioner:

"There is a man out with Marielle who is saying he is her dad but it's not her dad. I don't know what to do. I know Marielle's dad, I've seen him many times and this is NOT him."

Cynthia, the nurse practitioner told the receptionist that she would go out to the lobby and check on Marielle. So she went out and talked with Ralph a bit and then came back and told the receptionist that it was, in fact, Ralph, Marielle's dad who was with Marielle.

Ralph had only ever been to the clinic and hospital either coming from or going to work. So the receptionist had only ever seen him "looking military"....in uniform, short hair.

Well, Ralph hasn't cut his hair since September, last year, when he finished up his military time. It's quite long and curls now (you couldn't tell that it was curly before because it was "military short") not to mention that he has pierced ears and was dressed in what would be called, "Hawaiian casual".

I thought it was too funny that he was not recognized and think it's high time he got his hair cut!!! Doesn't this prove my point?

Become a bone marrow donor

2009-06-04T17:42:00.000-07:00

Please. Think about it. You can sign up by just having a cheek swab...no blood draw necessary.

You go on the registry and wait. If you happen to be a match, the donation now a days, is very similar to a blood bank donation. They hook you up to a machine, your blood goes in, they take the stem cells and then the rest of the blood goes back into your body. This takes about 3 hours.

Think about it...YOU COULD SAVE A LIFE. YOU COULD BE A HERO.

This month, the national registry is waiving the fee in a marathon to gather donors. That's right, you can sign up for NO FEE.

Leukemia does not know discrimination. It is insidious...it goes after young and old, white, black, yellow, brown...it doesn't matter. It went after my child and we were "lucky", all she needed was chemotherapy. Think about it, it's lucky that all we needed was years of chemotherapy.

There are those who are not so lucky, those who can only hope to survive with a bone marrow transplant. But what if you need a transplant and there is no match?

YOU COULD BE A HERO.

Go to one of the "Marrowathons":

Saturday 9 am-1pm Shorline Station 225 Cabrillo Hwy, Half Moon Bay

June 9th 8 am- 2 pm Stanford Cancer Center, 300 Pasteur Dr., Stanford

June 13th 10 am-4pm Central Park, San Mateo

June 16th 11 am- 3pm Kaiser South City

June 17th 5pm-7pm Foster City Athletic Club, Foster City

Become a donor, become a hero!

So a little about me

2009-06-03T16:03:00.000-07:00

Ever since I had my Gyn surgery, about 6 weeks ago, I've had hip pain. They put me in the stirrups while I was out under anesthesia and when I woke up and they had me get up in the recovery room, I had groin pain. I thought that they must have pulled my groin muscle while putting me in or taking me out of the stirrups.

After a couple of weeks of pretty good pain, I went to see the orthopedist. He said that the xrays showed that I had arthritis in that hip. He also said that if you xray just about anybody over the age of 50, they probably have some arthritic changes, but the fact that it's symptomatic is what we had to address. Ok. So, I went on NSAIDS and steroid pills and waited for things to get better. But they didn't...my hip pain actually increased.

It would be pretty good for a couple of hours and then I'd take a step and ouch! the pain would be sharp like a knife. But the worst would be getting up from a chair. I'd get up fine, maybe 7 out of 10 times but the other 3 times, it was like something was stuck, I couldn't straighten my leg or bear weight, it felt like something was in the hip between the bones. And let me tell you, it is unbelievably painful.

So, I went back yesterday to the orthopedist and he thinks that I might have a tear in the labrum, the cartilage that surrounds the hip. I go tomorrow for a contrast MRI to see what it shows. In the meantime, I'm still on the meds and hope that the pain will subside.

Sorry I asked...

2009-06-01T13:14:00.001-07:00

So yesterday, around 3 pm, Rico was in the dining room eating something. Huh? He shouldn't be eating anything, the kids are supposed to ask before they grab a snack....

He was over by Ralph's computer and he had that "caught in the act" kind of look on his face and I thought maybe he snagged something Ralph had near his computer. When I asked him what he was eating, he just grinned and didn't say anything. Then I asked again and he opened his mouth and I turned away, not wanting to see half eaten food and said sternly, "No, don't show me, tell me, use your words...what are you eating"

"Boogers" he said with a big grin.

Sorry I asked.

OPEN HOUSE!!!

2009-05-27T13:02:00.001-07:00

Tonight is open house at the kids' school. They are both so excited about it. They can't wait to show off their rooms. Now, mind you, it's not like I haven't seen their rooms, I've been a parent volunteer most of the year, but it's different for open house, you know. Anyway, Rico has silkworms and ducklings in his room and Marielle has butterflies and silkworms in her room and they are so excited to share them with us.

I also want Marielle to check out the room she'll be having next year. Yes, I know that we're not supposed to know who the teacher will be until the day before school starts, but a little blue jay was on my lawn the other day and told me who it would be. I told Ralph about the little birdie telling me who Marielle would have next week and then I said, "Oh and she said, 'I could tell you but then I'd have to kill you".

Of course, Rico overheard this and went kooky. He said, "How can a bird kill you?" and I told him I guess it could peck me to death...then he hugged me and said he didn't want me to die. I laughed and told him not to worry.

Then, when Marielle came home from school and I told her who her teacher was going to be, Rico relayed the bird story. Marielle said, "Mom, you can tell me, who really told you, I can keep a secret" . Rico, very seriously, shouted, "NO, I don't want Mama to die!!!". Glad to know that Rico has my back...so NO sharing secrets with Marielle because I've got to keep on living!

So I ask you....

2009-05-23T19:12:00.001-07:00

Was it meant to be or what?

At the end of September, 2003, the Hague treaty agreement was ruled unconstitutional. The ban against international adoptions between the U.S. and Guatemala was lifted. In October, Rico was born. We had a fast, uncomplicated process and brought Rico home just as he was turning 4 months old.

Now, I always wanted 2 children. Ralph never wanted more than one. When we adopted Marielle, we had agreed that the only way we'd ever adopt again was if Marielle had a biological sibling placed for adoption. Hmmm, so let's recap....

Twelve families passed up Marielle. We got her. Not 2 years later, after a ban on international adoptions had been in place in Guatemala, the ban was lifted, Marielle's brother was born, and we were able to adopt him.

Was it meant to be or what?

Without Marielle, we'd never have Rico. I'm sure I'd be very happy being a mommy to one little girl. But I'm over the moon happy that I am the mom of 2. Two kids who are very close in age, who love each other very much, who are both very sweet and very unique.

And when Marielle was diagnosed with cancer and going through treatment I often thanked God for Rico, who kept me sane, kept me grounded during treatment. He really didn't get what was going on, he wasn't even 2 at the time of diagnosis, but he's always been a little comedian and he kept us all smiling and kept Marielle giggling, even in the worst of times.

Was it meant to be or what?

Oh, and the ban is back in place again today. The anti-adoption factions were able to put another law in place that shut down international adoptions. How very sad for the children left behind....

2009-05-22T07:52:00.001-07:00

In late 2002, Guatemala acceded to the Hague Convention, a set of rules governing international adoption. This, in effect, shut down adoptions between the U.S. and Guatemala. The rules of the convention state that adoptions can only take place between countries that have implemented the Hague Convention. The U.S. had ratified the Hague but had not implemented it. Why? Not exactly sure, but some of it was funding. Now, if the U.S. cannot fund the directives of the Hague, how could Guatemala?

Anyway, adoptions shut down. Attorneys on the Guatemalan side argued the case before their Supreme Court, saying that the implementation of the Hague had been done unconstitutionally. In the meantime, no children, even children who were "in process" were being allowed to have their adoptions completed.

Such were the circumstances when we made contact with Marielle's birthmom. The searcher had located her and we were told to call the searcher on the appointed day and time and we would be able to speak with her. Neither Ralph nor I speak spanish, so the searcher became the translator as well. We had a nice talk, well, it was mostly me asking questions but I was glad to know that the birthmom was happy that we had made contact.

She told us that she had twice gone back to the attorney's office to see if there were any news about Marielle and was told there was not. We had, however, emailed both updates and pictures to the attorney. See, in Guatemala, well, it's a lot like the U.S. in maybe the 1930's....the prevailing idea is that you give up the baby and then forget about it and go on with your life. As if a mother could ever forget about her baby.

It was shortly after this conversation that we were notified by the searcher that Marielle's birthmom was pregnant again. She wanted us to adopt the baby or find another couple that lived close by to adopt the baby, so that the children would be able to see each other as they grew up.

Oh my God, this was not something we expected at all. We only ever expected to adopt one child. We had agreed that we'd only have one child. What should we do? I could not fathom saying no, I could not wrap my mind around the idea that a birth sibling of Marielle's so close in age would be "out there" somewhere growing up.

On the other hand there were lots of considerations. International adoption is not cheap. You are paying fees to 2 governments, an adoption agency here in the U.S., an attorney in Guatemala to oversee the adoption, fees associated with DNA testing (which is done to assure that it is the birthmom relinquishing the baby) and on and on.

So, here was the situation....if we filed documents and chose to try and adopt the baby, we might never be able to complete the adoption, because of the Hague. We would have to go through a new homestudy, all the paperwork for 2 governments, find an attorney who would handle the adoption (most attorneys were not even allowing adoptions to begin under the circumstances) pay for foster care ourselves, since we had no idea how long the foster care might go on and put out a big chunk of money and hope.

After much consideration, it boiled down to this....this was Marielle's sibling. And because it was not just "some baby", it was her sibling, we would go ahead and begin the process. We filed our paperwork, started the homestudy and laid out $10,000. (just part of the fee). My feeling was this....if it was meant to be, it would happen. If not, well, then we would never be able to bring Marielle's sibling into our home.

Boy this story is long....

2009-05-20T11:38:00.001-07:00

So, it took another 7 weeks for us to get immigration clearance, new birth certificate and the "pink slip", which was permission for us to go to the U.S. embassy and obtain a visa to bring Marielle home. We traveled to Guatemala once again to bring her home. I had a great time shopping! There was a little alleyway not far from the hotel that had all kinds of little shops that sold Guatemalan made items and boy did I stock up.

Then one day, we took the shuttle over to the area by the airport that had many shops that also sold Guatemalan hand made articles. Not knowing how soon we might return, I had to make sure I bought lots and lots of things!

We brought Marielle home and settled in, becoming a family of 3. I was so happy, as was Ralph and Marielle really was the easiest baby in the world. She never cried, unless she was hungry. So, if I kept bottles on schedule, she was a happy camper. She would wake from naps and just lie there waiting for me to come in and get her. I'd check on her, see her lying there, eyes wide open and say, "Hi, you're awake". Imagine my surprise, when one day when Marielle was only 6 months old, when she actually answered me with a "hi" back!

It's true, she started talking at 6 months old! First word was hi, followed quickly by dog. Marielle is and always has been an animal lover. So, not mama, not dada, but dog. When she realized that saying "dog" would not bring the dog over to her crib, she learned to say our dog's name. So, as you can see, calling for Mama was never high on the list. Calling the dog, however, was very high on the list!

Recently, we were watching some old videos and it was so fun to see her and Belle, our border collie, playing when Marielle was not even a year old. Belle would bring over her toy, Marielle would throw it and giggle like crazy and then Belle would bring it back and they'd start all over again.

As the months went by, I thought a lot about possibly making contact with Marielle's birth mother. I have a sister who was adopted from Vietnam and I talked to her about this. Her answer was, "I have a great life, I love my life, but I would trade everything I have for one picture of my birthmom". That really spurred me on. I talked to Ralph about it, he was on the fence, not really sure it was a good idea. Finally, we decided to talk to a searcher about it.

I contacted a searcher and spelled out what I wanted. I wanted to make contact, but only if it didn't put the birthmom in any danger and only if she wanted contact, too. I didn't want to harm or harass her in any way. We had heard stories of some birthmoms hiding their pregnancies from their families or lying and saying that the baby died, because placing a child for adoption is shameful in Guatemala. I wanted to be very clear that , although I welcomed contact, I in no way wanted to put the birthmom in an uncomfortable position.

With that in mind, we hired a searcher and waited to see what would happen.

Remembering...

2009-05-19T17:08:00.001-07:00

Anyone who is an adoptive parent knows that their joy is also another's sorrow. With that in mind, I just wanted to say thank you to Marielle's birth mom. Thank you for having the courage to place her for adoption.

I've told her this in person and I will say it again. Her courage saved Marielle's life. Had Marielle remained in Guatemala, had she not been adopted to the U.S., she simply would not be alive today.

So her birthmom not only gave her life, she saved her life as well.

Yeah, it's a party!

2009-05-18T10:26:00.000-07:00

So yesterday, in the sweltering heat (high 90's) we had a party for Marielle.

Hey, the heat didn't bother her a bit. She loves the heat. Besides, she got to drink soda, a rare treat.

Of course there was food....

There were presents to be opened....Uh, hey, wait, whose birthday is it?

Oh, that's right, that's what little brothers are for, helping, yeah, I get it....

Hmm, I think I'll sneak a taste of the birthday cake while mom is putting the candles on.

Whoa, that's a lot of fire for me to blow out...

Eating cake....yeah, we're having fun now!

Lots of hugs to go around....

And then, because it was so hot...off to the pool!

All in all, a great day!

Happy Birthday, Marielle!

2009-05-18T06:44:00.000-07:00

Happy 7th Birthday, my sweet girl.

You make my heart happy. You made my dream come true.

I love you so much!

The first time, ever I held you....

2009-05-17T19:17:00.001-07:00

In adoptions from Guatemala, the birth mom signs off 4 times during the adoption process. First, at relinquishment, then again in Family Court, at DNA testing and lastly at the very end, finalizing the adoption. We were told that if we wanted to visit our baby, before she was legally ours, it was best to wait until after Family Court and DNA testing was complete. If a birthmom were going to change her mind, it would most likely be at one of those 2 events, since at those events, she sees the baby again.

The first time I held Marielle, she was 7 weeks old. Oh my God, here was my baby. I loved her with all my heart already. I wish I could tell you it was sunshine and roses, but honestly, I was scared, very scared! I mean, I wanted to be a mom and went through hell to become one and then I had this little life that was 100% dependent on me! What was I thinking?!

We met Marielle for the first time in a hotel in Guatemala. Her foster family brought her to us. I liked her foster mom from the moment we met. I could tell how much she loved her girls and Marielle. I was nervous, she was reassuring. We bonded. We still write and exchange pictures with them. She is a far away sister, a sister of my heart. She loved and cared for my child when I could not. She later said that of all the babies she fostered, she really wanted to adopt Marielle. I could understand why....Marielle was the sweetest, easiest baby you'd ever meet. She didn't cry unless she was hungry. Keep her bottles on schedule and you'd never hear a peep out of her.

Oh and she was the biggest cuddle bug (and still is). She loved to be held and those big brown eyes would just look up at me and my heart would melt.

And so Carmen dropped off Marielle and she was all ours for 4 days....all ours. Oh crap! I'd never been 100% responsible for a baby before and I was so scared, that first day, that I'd do something wrong somehow and mess her up for life. But at the end of that first day, I remember looking at her lying in her crib and then getting undressed and smelling my shirt and saying to Ralph, through tears, "Oh my God, I smell like baby....I smell like my baby".

Only she wasn't my baby yet. Three of the four steps had been done....relinquishment, DNA, Family Court, but the final sign off hadn't happened yet.

The day we returned from Guatemala, visiting Marielle, we got a phone call from the agency telling us that the fourth step, the final signature had happened, while we were visiting Marielle in Guatemala! She was ours. SHE WAS OURS!!

(We weren't able to bring her home yet. We still had to get a new birth certificate issued, showing us as the parents, clear Guatemalan Immigration and get a U.S. visa for Marielle to enter the country. But still, she was ours.)